


The Walking Dead: The Holy-Cross Dyads

by D_J_Marlowe



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: M/M, The Hilltop (Walking Dead)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-02
Updated: 2018-07-02
Packaged: 2019-05-25 16:27:08
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 31,509
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14981018
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/D_J_Marlowe/pseuds/D_J_Marlowe
Summary: Daryl Dixon and Paul 'Jesus' Rovia, what would their conversation be when they aren`t involved with anyone else? Probably getting involved with each other.





	The Walking Dead: The Holy-Cross Dyads

**Author's Note:**

> A 'dyad' is a duet. There are basically only two characters in this experimental work: Daryl Dixon and Paul 'Jesus' Rovia. What conversation would they have in the in between moments after the war with the Saviors is over? What would bring them together? This takes place right after the war and before the time jump of Season 9 of 'The Walking Dead' TV series. This is my 4th Daryl/Jesus meet and get-together work and probably the last in that particular category. 
> 
> There are 5 parts (chapters, acts). I basically kept to one rule throughout this work. On the rare occasion where another character speaks they only get one line, but it is to further the plot somehow or comment on the action taking place. Just some silliness I`m engaged in because I`m a writer first and a fan second, both interchangeable at will.

**#1----FOWL PLAY**

 

       Since there was no more light pollution from large cities the nights seemed darker and more foreboding as Jesus squatted next to a small campfire roasting a rabbit he had snagged for his evening meal. He had been out scavenging alone for two weeks and felt if he didn`t bring something back to Hilltop his excursion would be unsuccessful. He was tired of disappointing people and disappointing himself. So far this night was like any other night. Every little nocturnal noise was enhanced against the silence as the last of the noisy summer insects were winding down their nightly cacophony. There was the sound of distant thunder so he knew a thunderstorm might be approaching his small camp. When he heard a sound coming from the bushes, it was too dark and the fire was too dim to discern exactly what it was. He held up his hand gun, prepared to take on whatever it was--walker, animal, a lone wanderer....

       "Hey, put that down, man." Daryl Dixon emerged from the foliage his hands raised, the crossbow in his left hand.

       Jesus lowered the gun and sighed with relief. He motioned for Daryl to come join him by the fire. "Didn`t know there would be anyone else out here this time of night."

       "I saw the flickerin`," Daryl said as he squatted down opposite Jesus. "Still out scavengin`?"

       "Yeah, backpack is full, but there isn`t much."

       "Maggie said she was worried about ya." Daryl tossed a couple sticks into the fire.

       Jesus leaned back for a moment to rub a knot out of his back. "What are you doing out here this time of night?"

       "Deer huntin`. They come out mostly at night."

       "Any luck?"

       "Nah." Daryl shrugged his backpack off and set the crossbow aside. The fire felt good and he shivered slightly. Virginia got chillier sooner than Georgia and he had yet to mentally adjust to the difference in climate. He stared at Jesus for a few moments. "Ya sure ya know how to hunt rabbits?"

       Jesus shrugged. "Don`t know. Well, maybe. Certainly not with a knife or a gun."

      "That ain`t no answer."

      "I`m not exactly sure what the answer is." Jesus turned the rabbit over to cook it on the other side.

      "Ya avoidin` Hilltop for some reason?" Daryl`s curiosity had been piqued. He and Jesus had become friends, closer than he expected he would be to the man.

      "I wouldn`t exactly call it avoiding, just out scavenging. I needed some space to think. There are times I feel guilty that the war with the Saviors could have been avoided, our losses not so devastating. Maybe we could have done something differently to take out Negan and just Negan alone." Maggie had told him there was nothing that could be done about the situation, but the guilt constantly nagged at the back of his conscience.

      "Nobody`s blamin` ya for nothin`. We all made mistakes durin` the war, includin` me." Daryl had now realized that maybe it was a mistake to ram the garbage truck into the Sanctuary, mostly out of a blinding anger that had almost consumed him to the very core. The war with the Saviors was over but the war with Negan being alive did consume him. The fact that he had to strongly disagree with the decision that Rick and Michonne had made about allowing Negan to live fostered his anger somewhat. He now spent his days doing what he loved best, such as hunting, in an effort to control his temper a little better. He removed a flannel shirt from the backpack and slipped it on hoping to stem off some of the oncoming chill. "Gonna be cold tonight."

      "Yeah. It`ll be autumn soon." Jesus removed the rabbit from the fire and inspected it. It was just right. He tore off a bit and offered it to Daryl, who reached over and took it.

      "Thanks."

      "It`s not much. I`m not that great of a hunter. Never shot a deer anyway."

      "Takes practice."

       They heard a couple owls in the trees above them.

       Jesus sighed. "Shit. I still have to pitch the tent. Usually I find an old building or house to spend the night. I got turned around in the woods when I tried to avoid a large herd of walkers. By the time I got my bearings the sun was setting."

       "Mind if I stay in your camp tonight? I got a couple blankets. I can stay by the fire." Daryl felt fatigue starting to set in, so in many ways he was grateful to have found the small camp when he did, especially when he heard the distant thunder.

       "It`s going to get chillier, especially when the fire goes out. I got a sleeping bag I can lay out flat inside the tent. It`s big enough for two. It`ll be safer. We can stay warm with the blankets." Jesus knew Daryl was a practical man. Anytime he could spend with Daryl always delighted him whether it was in his trailer at Hilltop or out in the woods.

       That suggestion actually appealed to Daryl. "Alright." He laughed slightly. "Sleep with one eye open cuz of of the walkers anyway."

       "Doesn`t sound very restful."

       "It ain`t."

       Jesus finished his portion of the rabbit and tossed the bones into the fire. "How long have you been out here hunting?"

       "Three days. Won`t go back `til I get that deer, maybe some turkeys."

       "Are people that bad off?" Jesus realized that maybe he had been gone too long.

       "Stretched pretty thin. Maggie don`t wanna kill one of them cows, but she might have to."

       Jesus closed his eyes, disturbed at that prospect. "We need the cows for milk for the babies. Damn." He angrily tossed the other remains of the rabbit into the fire. "Scavenging is thin anymore. The Saviors took a lot."

       Daryl could sense the frustration in Jesus since he had felt it as well. "I`ll help ya. Ya gotta map, right?"

       "Yeah. A lot of places aren`t on it though."

       "We`ll find somethin`. If we can`t take it with us, we`ll go back to Hilltop and get a vehicle."

       Jesus actually looked forward to having Daryl as company. "Okay. Right now I`d be going back mostly empty handed. I would just let people down and I`ve done too much of that lately."

       "Ya didn`t let nobody down. If it ain`t there, it ain`t there. We gotta find it is all." Daryl got up. "Let`s get that tent pitched. Get some rest."

       "Yeah, I am tired. Maybe I`ll be able to think clearer in the morning." Jesus stood up and stretched. He looked up at the sky and could see an almost full moon through the trees as vapor clouds from the oncoming storm slowly moved across it. "Hard to believe that there was a time when someone walked on the moon. Now look at us. Barely scraping by."

       Daryl looked at him somewhat worriedly. He had never heard Jesus sound so discouraged before. "Hey, we`re makin` it, man. We`re still here."

       "Yeah." Jesus bent down and picked up the roll that was the tent. "I suppose you`re right."

       They put the tent up in silence and Jesus prepared the bedding. Daryl put up the fence of cans around the small campsite. Both of them had attuned their senses to the slightest sound the cans made, able to discern if it was the wind or something else disturbing them. They could hear the sound of thunder coming closer.

       "Oh wonderful," Jesus said. "That storm is heading this way."

       "Been a long time since I camped out in the rain," Daryl said. "Don`t like it no better."

       Jesus pounded in a stake to stabilize the tent. "I could certainly use a few lessons about surviving in the wilderness. I`ve learned some, but I`m not really an expert."

       "Be glad to teach ya." In fact, Daryl had felt a strong desire to spend more time with Jesus since the war with the Saviors had ended. He didn`t mind staying at Hilltop, and in a way he felt he owed an obligation to Maggie to help her and Glenn`s unborn baby come into a more secure world.

       "Really? I`d like that." Jesus had kept his feelings for Daryl under wraps during the war. Now he wasn`t sure how to approach the man about those feelings so decided to keep them to himself for the time being. He wasn`t even sure if Daryl was attracted to him in any way. In fact, Daryl didn`t seem to be attracted to anyone in a romantic way. Or if he was, he just didn`t show it. Jesus put out the fire and they bedded down in the tent for the night. The thunder seemed closer, but the rain stayed away. The oncoming storm did push some cooler air in their direction so both of them huddled under the blankets, which were army issue.

       "Hilltop`s a good place," Daryl said. "Wish Maggie would find a way to get rid of Gregory."

       They were now facing each other as they conversed. Jesus snorted. "I stayed away because Gregory was in charge. I knew the man was a coward and that made me nervous since cowards do desperate things. He doesn`t disappoint."

       "Maggie`s got good sense. Like her father."

       "Did you know him?"

       Daryl nodded. "He was a good man." Daryl would never forget how Hershel had influenced him to be a better person than he was when all he had was Merle to influence him. Hershel had given him a sense of confidence that he could be a responsible leader given the right circumstances. There would always be a slight pang of guilt that he could have done more to hunt down the Governor and Hershel might have lived longer or still even be alive, but that was in the past and he had to put it behind him as he had to do so many other things. There were times his thoughts even drifted towards the future.

       "As soon as Maggie took over I wanted to hang around Hilltop more." Jesus hoped he wasn`t boring Daryl with his current situation. "But something is driving me away and I`m not sure I know what it is."

       "Does that mean you`re runnin` away?"

       "I don`t know. I know that`s not a good solution, but I don`t know what else to do." Why was he pouring out so much to Daryl? They could hear the soft patter of sprinkles on the sides of the tent. "See? I told you that you needed to stay in the tent."

       Daryl adjusted into a more comfortable position and yawned. "Let`s hope it`s dry in the mornin`. G`night."

       "`Night," Jesus watched as Daryl closed his eyes and was soon asleep. He tried to sleep, but his mind was just too restless, due mostly to the fact that Daryl was so close in proximity and that they somewhat opened up to each other. Perhaps that`s what made him restless, the fact that he needed to open up to someone as Maggie had suggested. He concentrated on listening to the sprinkling rain for a while and was able to finally be lulled into a restless sleep.

       When morning dawned Jesus was awakened by the smell of eggs being cooked over a open fire. Yawning, he peeked out of the tent and saw Daryl preparing some breakfast grub in the skillet. Daryl glanced at him and nodded. "`Mornin`."

       "That smells wonderful. Where did you find the eggs?"

       "From a bunch of stray chickens." Daryl pointed to a small grove of bushes. "Tried to catch `em. No luck."

       Jesus laughed. "And if you did, how would we transport them back to Hilltop unless we killed them?"

       Daryl shrugged. "Maybe we`ll get lucky and find a vehicle."

       Jesus just shook his head and smiled slightly. "So, you were serious when you said you would help me scavenge." He sat beside the fire and watched as Daryl turned the grub over and over for even cooking.

       "Huntin`. Scavengin`. We`re both on the same mission, right?"

       "Yeah, you could say that. There`s a small cabin and some buildings not far from here I want to check out. Maybe we`ll find our vehicle there and some fuel. Probably where the chickens came from." For the first time Jesus felt hopeful about finally finding something valuable for his community. He needed a shot in the arm from that prospect in the worst way.

       Did Daryl detect a slight hint of lightness in Jesus`s demeanor, considering his mood from the night before? "Good place to start."

       The food was finished and Jesus produced a couple plates from his pack. He handed Daryl a bottle of water. "Sorry, but the coffee is a no-go this time around."

       Daryl hissed a laugh. "Always liked a good cup to start out the day."

       "I remember going up to the coffee places being grumpy as hell until I got a good whiff of what was brewing. All the choices we had, I sometimes could not decide."

       "Never had the fancy shit." Daryl took several bites of his food and talked with his mouth full as he licked his fingers. "Just a good cup if java from the local cafe, black."

       Jesus noticed the gestures and raised an eyebrow realizing how Daryl did this without any conscious thought. "I loved stuffing myself with pancakes, too."

       "Biscuits and sausage gravy for an ole southern boy like me."

       Jesus smiled. There was so much he wanted to learn about the mysterious brooding redneck from Georgia. He had looked down for a moment to concentrate on eating and when he looked up he saw Daryl just simply staring at him. "We sometimes slaughter a pig. According to Ms. Maitlin, that`s an easy dish to make."

       Daryl nodded his approval. He realized he had been staring at Jesus and quickly looked away. When they finished eating, they broke camp and headed in the direction Jesus had found the cabin. The sound of growling walkers greeted them when they got nearer to the area.

       "Looks like about half a dozen," Daryl said as he observed the scene.

       "And those are the ones we can see."

       They both prepared their weapons and when Daryl nodded both of them emerged out of the bushes in fighting mode. The six walkers were soon taken care of. There were about a dozen more that had been hiding between the buildings. Daryl watched in awe as Jesus took out four combining his martial arts skills with his knives. He sometimes wondered if he could learn how to fight with dual knives. Maybe even have Jesus teach him. Daryl took out a couple more with his crossbow and knifed another. One grabbed him and pulled him down to the ground and fighting with kicks and shoving got a handful of walker goo. He slammed his fist into the skull and it fell dead on his chest. He angrily shoved it off.

       "Fuck this," Daryl said.

       Jesus had already taken care of the stragglers and gave Daryl a hand up. Recovering they looked around the complex of buildings which consisted of a small cabin, several outbuildings, and a barn. There was a chicken coop full of chickens to Daryl`s right. "There`s our chickens," Jesus said.

       Daryl wiped his hands on his clothes. "Maybe there are some crates in that barn. I wonder what this place was."

       "Doesn`t look like a crop farm. I see pens for livestock, but mostly housing for fowl." They heard a loud scream and when they saw its source they were unsure whether to laugh or run. They did both as a rather aggressive gander chased them towards the cabin. They could still hear it hissing and growling at them when Jesus slammed the door of the cabin shut.

       "Shit, even walkers won`t mess with a damn gander," Daryl said, grinning.

       Jesus laughed. "Forget the walkers, I wouldn`t either." They stood there just looking at each other and laughing. "Look at us, the two fiercest fighters anyone has ever seen since the world fell and we`re taken out by a gander."

       "Them things hurt when they bite."

       "I take it you know that from experience?" Jesus asked.

       "Yeah." Daryl unslung his pack and set it aside. They made a quick check for walkers inside the cabin. Finding none they decided to rest until they could determine their next move.

       "I saw the garage by the barn. Let`s hope there`s a vehicle there," Jesus said.

       "And that it ain`t a tractor."

       There was a clap of thunder. "Oh great, more rain." Jesus set his pack, sleeping bag, and the rolled up tent down.

       They could hear the sudden downpour beat against the roof which leaked slightly in one corner. "Man, I gotta take a piss. I was gonna do it by a tree," Daryl said.

       "I think the trees will get plenty watered today."

       Daryl was always amused by Jesus`s wry sense of humor. He went into the room set aside as a bathroom.

       While Daryl was gone Jesus looked around the room. The furnishings and decor looked simple enough. There was a dusty sofa and a couple chairs that looked comfortable, a dining table with three wooden chairs near a kitchenette. Also, some end tables and a couple more chairs. Some landscape paintings were on each side of a fireplace that had the mounted head of a bear above it. There was a large stack of firewood next to it. Since the rain had made things chilly Jesus decided to start a fire. He was loading wood into the fireplace when Daryl returned.

       "Until this rain lets up we can stay in here," Jesus said.

       They instantly became alert when they heard a low steady staccato sound. Daryl quickly raised his crossbow, Jesus his rifle. When they realized it was a chicken pecking its way from one room to the other, they both lowered their weapons at the same time and looked at each other a bit comically.

       "Shit," Daryl said. "We`re havin` roast chicken for dinner." He sat down on the sofa, coughing as a cloud of dust wafted up into the air causing him to wave his hand.

       Jesus got a fire going and sat down beside Daryl. "If this place was used to raise fowl we might find turkeys and ducks nearby as well."

       Daryl dug out a cigarette and lit up. "They ain`t scattered too much." He tossed the match into the roaring fire.

       Jesus sighed, laid back his head and closed his eyes. There was a slight smile on his face. Daryl looked over at him and simply stared at him as he smoked. Now that things had calmed down he had some time to examine the thoughts and feelings he had pushed away to the back of his mind. His admiration for Jesus was one that kept coming to the forefront. Jesus had proven himself on numerous occasions to be more than just a friend. A sense of peace always fell around Daryl when he was around him, something that he rarely felt with anyone, including Rick.

      Jesus opened one eye and looked directly at Daryl. "Hungry?"

      "Not yet. Why?"

      Jesus shrugged. "Nothing really." He closed his eye. "Did you sleep well last night?"

      "Couple hours then mostly dozing. Rain kept me up."

      "You looked like you were asleep."

      "I kept my eyes closed. Did you?"

      "No. I kept my eyes closed, too. I could use a nap right now."

      Daryl turned away from looking at him. "Yeah." He rested his head back, smoked for a bit longer then put out the cigarette. The thunder outside was soft and rolling as it complemented the sounds of the rain. Soon they were both asleep.

      Neither knew how much time had passed by but Jesus was suddenly awakened when a flapping of wings struck his face. He woke up to see the chicken walking across the edge of the sofa. He tried to make a grab for it, but it fluttered down to the floor and all he did was fall into a now awakened Daryl.

      "What the hell are ya doin`?" Daryl asked somewhat grumpily.

      "Attempting to catch a chicken." Jesus sat up and noticed that the chicken was now on the other side of the room. "Is it dinnertime yet?" His tone was somewhat prickly due to the rude awakening.

      "We can get it started cookin`." Daryl got up and carefully walked towards the chicken. It seemed to know someone was after it and at a fast pace ran around the room flapping its wings and clucking like crazy. Daryl made a leap towards it chasing it into the kitchenette. Jesus came up beside him and together they tried to make a grab for it.

      "I`ll go on the other side and chase it in your direction," Jesus said. 

      Daryl nodded. He waited until Jesus got into position as he carefully maneuvered the chicken towards Daryl. With a stomp of his foot he frightened the chicken causing it to flap about until it ended up on top of the dining table.

      "It`s in the right spot," Daryl said.

      "It just isn`t dead yet."

      Together they circled around the table, the chicken seeming not to care as if it had confidence that it could not get caught. Daryl made a leap towards it and the chicken flew right into Jesus`s chest. Jesus grabbed it and held onto it, causing it to squawk loudly. Daryl then grabbed the neck and sliced the head off with his knife. Jesus dropped it when blood spurted up into his face. They watched in dumbstruck awe as the headless chicken ran around the room, blood spurting everywhere.

      "It`s easier to kill than a walker," Daryl observed.

      "Still as messy." Jesus grabbed a dishtowel from a rack and was able to catch the headless chicken, which still squirmed in his grasp. He watched as Daryl sterilized his knife in the blaze of the fireplace. After a while the chicken was no longer moving. Jesus placed it on one of the counters in the kitchenette and unwrapped the towel.

      Daryl came up beside him. "You pluck, I`ll cut."

      "So you`re giving me the easy job? Feathers stick."

      "It`s still rainin`. Plenty of water to wash your hands."

      Jesus rolled his eyes. Without another word he started to pluck the feathers off of the chicken. Some of the down feathers flew up towards his nose and he sniffed as he felt himself on the verge of sneezing they tickled so much. Daryl watched him with some amusement. Jesus noticed the look. "You think this is funny?"

      "Yeah."

      Jesus tore off a wing and threw it right at Daryl`s chest. "Here, pluck that and cut it up." He tore the other wing off and threw it at Daryl as well. "That one, too."

      "You`re supposed to leave the wings on, dumbass."

      "I know. I just love pissing you off."

      Daryl glared at him. "You`re doin` a good job." He plucked at one of the wings and soon had it cleaned off. Then he worked on the other wing. They both were silent until the chicken had been plucked clean.

      Jesus took it over to the fire to singe the remnants of feathers off. After searching through the drawers around the sink Daryl found a mechanical spit and brought it over to the fireplace. Jesus slipped the chicken and the wings on the skewer and wound up the spit. Both sat down on the sofa and watched the spit turn.

      "Sorry about throwing the chicken wings at you," Jesus said.

      "Don`t pluck feathers much do ya."

      "No. I got dibs on the wings though."

      "Dibs on the drumsticks."

      They looked at each other, Jesus with one eyebrow raised, Daryl with a slight smirk. Jesus reached over and picked up his backpack to see what cans of food he had and found a can of baked beans and displayed it for Daryl to see. "Perfect."

      It would be a couple hours before the chicken would be done cooking so they took the opportunity to clean up using one of the rain barrels outside, even though it was still raining. Daryl had rinsed out the walker goo from his shirt and had found a fresh one. He was kneeling with no shirt on drying off by the fire when Jesus came back inside. He was also shirtless.

      "That water in that barrel was cold, but it felt good," Jesus said.

      "Looks like it might rain for the rest of the day and into the night," Daryl said.

      "We`ve got plenty of food. Water. We`re sheltered and warm. I really don`t want to spend another night in that tent in this kind of weather. Do you?"

      "Nah. We stay put. Look for some crates, baskets, some kind of workin` vehicle--load up as many birds as we can. There`s probably feed in the barn. Head back to Hilltop in the mornin`."

      Jesus nodded. "Sounds like a good plan to me. You can go after the gander."

      Daryl gave him a sidelong glance. "We`ll both go after that damn gander." He stretched out his arms to loosen them, wincing slightly on his right side where the scars of the bullet wound were located. The rainy weather wasn`t helping with the stiffness and slight pain. Jesus couldn`t help but stare and admire the muscles, but he also felt distressed when he looked at the scars all over Daryl`s back. Daryl sensed that Jesus was watching him but didn`t feel self-conscious concerning his scars. Jesus had seen them before when had had helped him clean up after his imprisonment in the Sanctuary. Jesus may have been the smaller man, but he was muscular as well. "Here, warm yourself up." Daryl put on his shirt then got up and sat down on the sofa. Jesus took his place in front of the fireplace. He quickly checked on the chicken, rewound the spit, and then put his own shirt on. He could feel Daryl`s eyes on him.

      By the time dinner was ready the sun had set behind the clouds and it continued to rain all night. It had stopped by morning and after a light breakfast they decided to check the barn for crates. They found several of them made for transporting animals and found a small flatbed truck in the garage. There were cans of gas and after fiddling with the engine Daryl was able to get it started.

      "This truck will be a great addition for Hilltop," Jesus said as he climbed out of the driver`s seat after backing it out of the garage. They surveyed the yard to get an idea of what birds were present. There were a couple dozen chickens, three female geese, the gander, some turkeys, and a family of ducks with several ducklings. All were running around freely. "Amazing how they were able to outrun the walkers and survive." Jesus took one of the crates and opened it up. "Which ones are first?"

      "Chickens," Daryl said. "We`ll round `em up next to the wall of the barn, scoop `em right up."

      "I guess that`s the best idea I`ve heard so far," Jesus said somewhat doubtfully.

      "Shut up and start chasin`." Daryl glanced at him with an amused twinkle in his eye. He had to admit to himself that being around Jesus for a short amount of time was quite fun, reminding him of some of the good times he and Merle used to have when they weren`t fighting or Merle doing drugs, just simply doing stupid things.

       Jesus pointed to the nearest chicken and started chasing it. The chicken ran swerving in several directions before it was finally going towards Daryl, who immediately grabbed it and put it in the crate. "That seemed easy enough," Jesus said.

      The rest of the chickens were rounded up in this manner, the two being quite comical as they chased one after another, sometimes almost running into each other as a chicken made a quick dodge in one direction or the other. After about an hour the two dozen or so chickens were rounded up and crated. Next were the ducks. Daryl had found a burlap sack and suggested they try to get the ducks all at once since they moved as a group. There was one drake, two hens, and about fifteen ducklings. Daryl was able to snag just the three adults with the burlap bag. They raised a ruckus inside the crate until the ducklings were put inside with them. They loaded the crates onto the flatbed and secured them.

       "What do you suggest we do for catching turkeys and geese," Jesus said.

       Daryl stood in silence for a moment before turning around and looking around the barn. "We can use that." He pointed to a large fishnet. "Turkeys first."

       Jesus shrugged. "I chase, you net?"

       Daryl nodded. "One at a time."

       Jesus pointed to one turkey. Daryl, with the net raised, slowly crept up behind it. He failed to get it on his first attempt, netting a bucket instead, causing Jesus to snicker. Daryl gave him a dirty look then proceeded to go after the turkey again. He got it on the second try. It struggled and gobbled, but they were finally able to crate it. There were only two other turkeys and after netting a walker`s head and a tree stump, Daryl was able to get both of them. They now stood together next to the flatbed and looked at the geese that were opposite them in the barnyard near a pump. The geese were looking back at them as if expecting what was to come next.

       "We go near those females, the gander will be on us something fierce," Jesus said.

       "We get the gander first," Daryl simply said.

       "That gander has it in mind to attack us no matter what we do. We need to think this out thoroughly."

       Daryl took a minute to form a strategy in his mind. "One of us could try to distract him, the other sneak up on him from behind."

       Jesus took the fishnet from him. "Why don`t you distract and I`ll sneak."

      "We could flip a coin." Daryl looked at him somewhat incredulously.

      "We don`t need to flip a coin. I`m the faster runner." Jesus stubbornly folded his arms.

      "Then the faster runner should be the one bein` chased. Just sayin`. 

      "No, the faster runner should be the one doing the chasing. I`ll catch him before he catches you." Jesus patted Daryl on the back. "That`s a promise."

      Daryl snorted and hissed a laugh. "Let`s quit arguin` and just do it."

       "Alright. Here goes nothing. Start distracting."

       Daryl cleared his throat and flexed his legs. The nip on the hand he had taken from a gander when he was a child had always been fresh in his mind. He wasn`t able to run from it then. Well, he was an adult now, so.... Daryl eyed the gander. It seemed to sense what it was he was up to and stared back at him and hissed before taking a few steps towards him. Daryl glanced at Jesus to make sure he was moving into position. Jesus had moved off to the side in order to eventually get behind the gander. Daryl moved a couple more steps closer to the gander, pretending he was going to go after one of the females. He knew the gander would be protective and defensive. It hissed and snapped, madly flapping its wings at him.

       "Be ready with that net," Daryl said with a warning tone in his voice.

       "Quit your worrying." Jesus watched closely calculating the strategy in his mind.

       Daryl moved even closer. This time the gander sensed a threat and started running towards Daryl, hissing, snapping, flapping and suddenly leaping into the air and striking Daryl who ducked just in time. Daryl then sidled along, moving his arms back and forth, glancing every once in a while at Jesus, who seemed to be laughing at the spectacle while he moved into position behind the gander. Daryl moved closer and the gander attacked again, honking and hissing, almost taking a nip at Daryl`s ear.

       "Goddammit!" Daryl yelled. "That was close."

       "You`re doing fine." Jesus was now closing in behind the gander with the fishnet raised.

       Daryl looked around until he found a big stick to at least try fending it off if it got too close again. He found a slender board about eighteen inches long and hoped that it would do the trick. He made one more approach as Jesus got closer to the bird. Just as Jesus thought he had it in the bag, the three females started honking as if giving off a warning to the gander, causing it to turn and face Jesus, who came down with the net missing it by inches.

       "Oh shit." The gander was on top of Jesus for a couple seconds then started chasing him. He tossed the net to Daryl. Just as the gander went in for another attack, Daryl was able to net it. It raised a fuss, but Daryl held the net firm. Jesus grabbed an empty crate and the two of them were able to get the gander inside. It hissed and kicked at the prospect of being held in captivity. "Think the others will be any easier?"

       "Maybe." Daryl`s uncertain tone didn`t comfort Jesus any.

       They prepared another crate. The females, even though they sometimes fought them off, were easier to catch since they were more frightened without the gander. When both of them had finished they were covered in down feathers and some bird shit.

       "Well," Jesus said, "We got it done."

       "Ya gotta admit it was kind of fun," Daryl said laughing somewhat.

       "Yeah. I thought we made a great team." Jesus looked up at the sky. The sun was shining with no hint of any clouds. "We got transportation and we`re not far from Hilltop. Want to go home?"

       Daryl nodded. "You can start loading those bags of feed in the barn. I`ll go get our stuff and weapons." He headed for the house. Moments later he returned with their things, walking by the crate containing the gander and was hissed and squawked at. "Shut up. Stupid bird."

       Jesus shook his head with silent snickers. After they finished loading up he got in on the driver`s side. Soon they were on the road with sounds of chickens, ducks, turkeys, and geese accompanying them.

       After driving for a while Jesus said, "It could be worse."

      "How`s that?" Daryl asked as he yawned.

      "We could have found a bull."

      "We`d have nothin` but more bullshit to add to yours. Keep drivin`."

      Jesus smiled to himself as the sun slowly made its way towards the western horizon. They would be back at Hilltop before it set and back in his trailer. Jesus had missed his bed more than anything and hopefully would get the kink out of his back. When they reached Hilltop it was a warm welcome when everyone saw what they had brought. That night they both slept soundly in Jesus`s trailer, the arrangement of Jesus in the bed and Daryl on the sofa. After getting dressed that next morning and enjoying a hearty breakfast prepared by Ms. Maitlin, Jesus proceeded to unpack his backpack on the picnic table as Daryl watched smoking a cigarette.

      "What do you think of these?" Jesus asked as he put down a set of two knives in light leather sheaths on the table.

      Daryl took one out and inspected it. He couldn`t believe how lightweight they were, but strong. "I like `em. Where`d ya get `em?"

      "Found them in a warehouse. The place looked picked over, but someone must have missed these. They`re yours if you want them."

      Daryl looked at him somewhat astonished. "Ya sure ya don`t want `em?"

      "I already have a set. Besides, you`re going to need them if you want to learn how to fight with dual knives. You can have some belts and straps made quite easily." By Daryl`s expression he could see that the other man was pleased. "Want to see how they would fare in a fight?"

      "We gonna find some walkers or somethin`?"

      "No, silly. I want to start giving you your first lesson."

      Daryl shrugged. "Alright." He got up and followed Jesus over to a clearing. The sounds of construction accompanied them as Jesus taught Daryl some basics by using his left hand only. He knew that Daryl could throw a knife with his right, but the key was how to coordinate the movements with a knife in each hand. After Daryl seemed to get how to work with his left hand Jesus then taught him how to use both at the same time. Daryl seemed to enjoy the lesson and even smiled a couple times, especially when Jesus adjusted his pose from behind. After about an hour they sat down to rest.

       "Tomorrow we`ll work with a dummy," Jesus said. "You catch on fast so I think you`ll have it down in no time."

       "I wanna focus on bein` quiet when killin` walkers," Daryl said. "Guns attract too much attention. When there`s a large herd I sometimes can`t get to the crossbow in time."

       "Or you want to be prepared if it gets stolen again." Jesus knew how insecure Daryl had felt when his weapon of choice was gone.

       "Yeah," Daryl said quietly.

       "I didn`t mean that the way it sounded. Only that such things happen to the best of us when we least expect it."

       If anyone else had said it, Daryl most likely would have punched him in the face, but he had become close enough friends with Jesus that he trusted the younger man`s wisdom and foresight. "You`re right. Guess I gotta get used to it all over again. This shit with Negan threw me off."

       "You will get back on track again. Like Maggie says this is how we bide our time. Right?"

       Daryl nodded. "Yeah." He examined the knives again. "Why give these to me?"

       Jesus shrugged. "Because I want to."

      Their eyes met and locked for a few seconds. Daryl felt almost overwhelmed with uncertainty as to why Jesus had given him so generous a gift on top of giving him lessons in how to wield them. There was something inside of him that didn`t feel right if he refused the man. A feeling he didn`t quite understand. For one thing, he didn`t feel comfortable calling the other man 'Jesus'. "Thanks, Paul."

       "You`re welcome." Jesus couldn`t help but shyly smile when he was called by his given name, especially by Daryl. Daryl felt a slight thrill move up and down his spine when he saw the way Jesus smiled. Then it hit him. He realized he was somewhat attracted to the man. He also realized it was something he didn`t find repulsive.

 

**#2----MOONSHINE, JOLLY`S POT, & CROSSBOW**

 

       The domesticated fowl that Daryl and Jesus had found had been a welcome addition to what they already had at Hilltop. After helping with some construction for a few days they decided to go out on another run together. Since they didn`t have a chance to check out the cabin and buildings as thoroughly as they wanted they decided to start there and arrived just a couple hours before noon. Some walkers had found their way back and they easily took care of them.

       "Looks like this place has plenty more to offer than birds," Jesus said as he knifed the last walker.

       Daryl looked around and noticed something familiar about one of the sheds. "Ya might be right about that. What`s that look like to ya?"

       Jesus followed where Daryl was pointing. "Ah. A still."

       They went over to where it was housed. There were empty mason jars strewn about and a basket of rotting corn cobs. Jesus found a cardboard box with filled up mason jars and held one up and showed it to Daryl.

       "How`s the seal look?" Daryl asked.

       "Unbroken. In fact, most of these jars still look okay."

       "You ever taste moonshine?"

       Jesus shook his head. "Nope. Never had the opportunity."

       Daryl opened his jar and sniffed it. He took a small sip. "Good stuff." He handed the jar back to Jesus. "Try it."

       Jesus took it from him and somewhat reluctantly looked at it, swishing the liquid around. After about half-a-minute he took a drink. "Whoa, that tastes like it can make your eyeballs explode." He took another drink.

      "Go easy on that, man. If ya ain`t used to it, ya need to start slow." Daryl took the jar back and resealed it then placed it back in the box.

      "You`re not thinking of taking that back to Hilltop are you?" Jesus wasn`t sure if he liked that prospect or not.

      "Ya never know. Medicinal purposes." Jesus chuckled at Daryl`s remark. "Let`s eat them sandwiches Ms. Maitlin made for us."

      They headed back over to the cabin to take up residence again since of late the elements seemed never to be in their favor. An almost autumn chill had now set in as Daryl built up the fire in the fireplace and Jesus took out the sandwiches and bottles of water from his pack. "I certainly hope we find more than moonshine here. I saw some eggs in the chicken house, but I don`t know how fresh they are."

       "Hens probably been layin` for a long time. There`s a way to find out."

       "Oh yeah?" Jesus was amazed at how much Daryl knew. "How?"

       "Ya need a bowl of water. If they`re good to eat, they sink or stand on end. If they`re bad, they float." Daryl took a bite of his sandwich.

       "You`re shitting me right?"

       "Nope. Learned that from a cousin who was a chicken farmer."

       Jesus burst into laughter. "Get out."

       "Ask Ms. Maitlin if ya don`t believe me."

      "I will, most definitely." Jesus reached over and grabbed the jar of moonshine they had been drinking from. "I heard it`s better to have food in your stomach when you`re drinking liquor." He unscrewed the lid and took a sip, then handed it to Daryl.

      "Little early in the day to be startin` with this shit. Especially for a beginner."

      "You mean to tell me you have never gotten drunk in the afternoon?"

      "Won`t say that." Daryl took a sip from the jar, shrugged, and took another sip. "Sometimes Merle would be high and I would be drunk."

      "I`ve been drunk, but never high. It`s been a long time since I was drunk, not since before the world went to hell." A look of sadness crossed Jesus`s face.

      "Why did ya get drunk?"

      "I had a breakup with my--I had a breakup." He almost said 'boyfriend' but thought better of it. "I was in a relationship and it didn`t work out. Nothing really important." Jesus turned away obviously not wanting to talk about it. He never talked about his relationships, mostly because there hadn`t been all that much to talk about since he never got close to people. His boyfriends usually just wanted him for his looks anyway, which made him withdraw into himself and not open up. For some reason, he didn`t feel that way around Daryl.

      "Sorry, don`t mean to bring up somethin` painful." Daryl could feel how much Jesus needed to talk to someone about certain things. He wasn`t sure if he was the right person for that, but was willing to listen anyway.

      "Oh, I`m over it. Have been for a long time. Haven`t had time for anything or anyone else." He paused. "Maybe that`s why I run away so much."

      Daryl turned away from him. He could feel the turmoil inside of himself, the turmoil brought on by a secret he had revealed to no one, not even to Rick, Michonne, or Carol. He knew deep inside that someday he would need to talk about it. He stood up. "I`m gonna check the other rooms."

      The two other rooms were basic bedrooms so he didn`t expect to find much. He rifled through the drawers and found a cigar box in one of them. The name 'Jolly' was written in marker on the top. It could only mean one thing. He brought it back to the living room.

      "Find anything interesting?" Jesus asked. His back was towards Daryl as he rummaged through his backpack. Daryl stood there for a moment as if to admire Jesus`s backside. Jesus stood up and turned around to face him. "Daryl?"

      "Huh? Yeah. I found this."

      "A cigar box?" A confused look was on Jesus`s face.

      "Can`t ya guess what`s in it?"

      Jesus stood in thought for a moment, his arms crossed. He then grinned. "Oh yeah?" He watched as Daryl opened the box. Inside were about a dozen or so marijuana joints, roach clips, rolling papers, and some matches.

      Daryl picked up one of the joints and gave it a good long sniff. "The good stuff."

      Jesus laughed. "How do you know?"

      "Merle was mostly into meth, but he dealt pot on the side. I`ve toked a few."

      Jesus noticed the name on the box. "I take it who lived here was named 'Jolly'."

      "Ain`t nothin` jolly about this place." Daryl stared long and hard at Jesus. "You ever smoke?"

      "Like in cigarettes?" Daryl nodded. "I started to in my teens until my karate instructor got on my ass about it. Why?"

      Daryl studied the joint for several seconds. "Shit, I could use a trip out of this reality for a while."

      "Nobody is bothering us here. I could use a good drunk," Jesus said nodding his head towards the jars of moonshine.

      "Why not both." Daryl handed Jesus one of the joints. "We`ll only feel like hell later, but it`ll be worth it."

      "We really should look through the other buildings here."

      "Ya in a hurry or somethin`?"

      Jesus paused for a moment. "No."

      "Alright. Hand me a jar of that moonshine."

      Jesus dug into the box and gave him one. "You really want to do this."

      Daryl shrugged. "Got nothin` better to do."

      "Except scavenging through the other buildings."

      "They ain`t sproutin` legs and goin` nowhere." Daryl struck a match and lit up his joint. He held the match towards Jesus who somewhat reluctantly lit his. "The trick is, ya hold it in for a bit."

      "Okay. I think I can do that." He watched as Daryl drew in some smoke from his joint and held his breath. Jesus slowly mimicked what Daryl did. He coughed at first, drinking down some of the moonshine to help clear his throat. On his second draw he did better. "Whoa, I can feel something already." Jesus could feel the rush of the drug the instant it worked on his brain. He sat down on the floor. 

      "Feels good don`t it," Daryl said as he held his breath on the second draw.

      "Yes, it does." Jesus closed his eyes. "Probably a good thing that I never started on this stuff when I was younger." He felt slightly dizzy and was glad he was resting his back against the side of one of the easy chairs.

      Daryl was also on the floor, his back against the front of the sofa. He took a long drink of moonshine. "Oh, man, this is good. Almost as good as my old man`s."

      "He was a bootlegger?"

      "Yeah, like his pa before him. Durin` Probishun."

      "Prohibition."

      "That`s what I said."

      "No. You said 'Probishun'."

      Daryl snorted a laugh. "Pro-hi-bi-shun. Probishun. Same thing."

      Jesus drew in and held his breath and snickered. "Oh, I feel so giddy all of a sudden." He exhaled and took a couple swigs of moonshine. "I`m a hippie now, man."

      "Ya always looked like one."

      "You always looked like a redneck?"

      "Yup. Ya wanna look like a redneck?"

      "Nope. But I want to feel one." For an instant he imagined his hands running all over Daryl`s body.

      Daryl snickered. "Ya wanna catch snakes and wrestle alligators."

      "No, but I want to wrestle--." Jesus looked directly at Daryl and laughed as the drug started to take more effect, causing his thoughts to run in all sorts of directions. Mixed with the moonshine he felt lightheaded and goofy. He stretched his arms out to the side. "My friends call me Jesus. Come unto the Lamb of God."

      "You ain`t no lamb," Daryl said grinning. Even though he had been drunk on moonshine and smoked pot in his past, it had been a long time and he felt it affecting him quicker than it used to. "I`m a lone wolf."

      Jesus howled like a wolf then laughed. "Hey, hey, you know what?" He moved over to sit by Daryl. "I need to find me a motorcycle."

      "Why?"

      "Because I hate driving cars and trucks all the time. I want to look cool." Jesus took another draw from his joint.

      "I think ya look cool. Except when ya wear that stupid beanie."

      "I like my beanie. You need a beanie, too." A shot of moonshine.

      Daryl gulped down a good amount from his jar. "Don`t want no damn beanie. I`d look silly."

      "Yeah, you would." Jesus took a deep breath and held his head between his legs. "Oh, man, I need to get used to this."

      Daryl rubbed Jesus`s back. "You`ll be alright. Take it easy."

      Jesus suddenly looked up. "I`m glad I got you out of there."

      "Out of where?" Daryl asked uncertain where Jesus was going with this line of thinking.

      "Out of the Sanctuary." Jesus reached up towards him. "You were so--so vulnerable." Tears started to well up in his eyes.

      Daryl looked down not wanting to revisit those particular memories. "I, uh, never thanked ya for that. I thought ya hated me."

      "For what?"

      "For killin` Fat Joey like I did." Daryl looked up, tears in his eyes as well.

      "You had your reasons." Jesus reached over and wiped away Daryl`s tears. Suddenly he tensed up as a pain moved through his back.

      "What`s wrong?" Daryl asked.

      "That kink in my back from sleeping on the ground won`t go away."

      "Here, let me help."

      "Oh, that feels good." Jesus sat there with his eyes closed as Daryl gently massaged his back for a moment. "Daryl, I--." He suddenly stopped himself. "Nothing."

      "What?"

      "Nothing." Jesus took a drink of moonshine. He looked up at Daryl. "I hope you consider me a friend."

      "What makes ya think I don`t?"

      "I don`t know, I don`t have many friends. No close friends anyway."

      "Hard to get close to people," Daryl said softly. "I don`t trust nobody, not even when Merle was alive."

      "Do you trust anyone now?" Jesus indicated that his back felt better.

      Daryl nodded. "Sometimes. Rick. Michonne. Carol. Maggie." He drank some moonshine and drew from the joint. "Our first meetin` was shaky,  but you`re part of my family now."

      "Nice to have a family." Jesus could feel himself start to tear up again. "Mine were all gone. All of them."

      "Ya had parents didn`t ya?"

      "Dead. When I was three they were killed in an accident. There were some distant cousins, but I hadn`t met most of them. They were more or less strangers." Jesus slowly took several sips of moonshine as he talked. His words started to sound otherworldly to him. "Grew up in a group home." He took a draw from the joint and held his breath. "The other kids were from broken homes or orphans like me."

       "But ya were alone most of the time."

       Jesus nodded. "Alone. With my thoughts. My books. I learned karate as a distraction. The shooting range, too."

      "I was alone a lot with Merle bein` in jail for dealin`." Daryl could feel his inhibitions slowly drop away and due to the marijuana and moonshine, he didn`t seem to care. "I took care of myself. Merle could go to Hell and I`d be alright."

      Jesus traced his finger along the side of the end table leaving a trail in the dust. He seemed to be fascinated by it for no particular reason, feeling somewhat outside of his mind. "Alone in a crowd."

      "What?"

      "At the group home. I was alone in a crowd. There were six others plus the foster parents." He burst into ironic laughter. "They could be such assholes."

      "Too bad all the assholes ain`t walkers," Daryl shouted. He tossed his empty jar across the room into the fireplace where it shattered into several pieces.

      "But all walkers are assholes." Jesus thought it was the funniest thing he had ever said.

      Daryl grabbed another jar of moonshine. He opened it up and held it towards Jesus. "To walkers."

      Jesus picked up his jar and clinked it with Daryl`s. "To walkers." He gulped down the last of it, tossed the jar into the fireplace and let it shatter, then took out another jar. "Boy, I sure got drunk fast."

     "And high."

     "Am I high? Jesus, I am high."

     "You`re Jesus. Or are ya Paul."

     "I`m both. Right now I want to be Paul."

      Daryl snickered. "Ya can be Paul. I`m Daryl."

      "Nice to meet you, Daryl." They shook hands. Jesus crawled around the floor for a moment. He tried to get up, but feeling dizzy lost his balance, feeling strong arms catch him before he hit the floor. "Oh, man, you can tell I`m not used to this." He looked up to see Daryl looking down at him. Their faces were close.

      "Ya better hold back for a while, Paul."

      Jesus reached up wanting to stroke Daryl`s face, then thought better of it. "I think my joint`s out anyway." He slowly sat back up. "Oh, I used to be able to take my liquor better."

      Daryl held up the jar of moonshine "This stuff is potent alright." He felt a wave of dizziness. "Shit, man, it`s gettin` to me." He looked up to see Jesus clutching a pillow and burying his face in it. "Ya okay?"

      "I don`t know. I run away and want to stay away. But I also want to stay. I`m not sure what I want. Did you know that was what Sasha asked me? She asked, 'what do you want, Jesus?'. I didn`t know the answer but I thought I knew the answer. Then I realized the answer involves someone else and I don`t think...." He stopped talking and slightly sobbed into the pillow.

      "Hey," Daryl said softly. "It`s alright." He took another draw from his joint. "I hate bein` alone, too."

      Jesus turned his head slightly and looked at him, they`re eyes locking on the other`s. "How do you know it has something to do with being alone?"

      "I just do. Man, I gotta take a piss." Daryl slowly stood up trying to steady himself.

      "You better not go outside alone." Jesus slowly got up, keeping his balance better as his head had cleared a little.

       They went over to the door and opened it only to be greeted by a female walker.

       "Hello, Frances," Daryl deadpanned. 

       "Don`t need to hear shit from any Jehovah`s Witness. Hi, I`m Jesus." He laughed as he took out his knife and stuck it in the walker`s head.

       Outside Jesus stood on watch as Daryl took care of his business by a tree. Jesus then took his turn with Daryl on watch. The cooler air helped them to clear their heads a little more. They decided to walk over to one of the other buildings and peered inside the dusty windows.

       "Nothin` but junk. Probably used for storage," Daryl said. He went over to the door and pried it open only to be greeted by the stench of death. They heard the sound of a walker hidden behind some of the stacks of detritus. Both realized they had left their primary weapons in the cabin, so both withdrew their knives.

       "Sounds like it`s just one," Jesus said.

      They proceeded with caution and when they found the walker, it had been pinned beneath the bumper of an old car. The name 'Jolly' was written on a patch above one of the pockets.

      "Our benefactor," Daryl said. He plunged the knife into its head.

      "I guess that`s the best we can do for him." Jesus saluted the dead walker and they left. "How about that shed over there with the folding doors."

      Daryl nodded and he peered through the window of one of the folding doors, looked at Jesus, and smiled. "I think we found somethin` worthwhile."

      "What is it?"

      Daryl jerked the door open and inside of the shed were two motorcycles. The chrome was still shiny even though there was a layer of dust over them. Jesus pulled back the other folding door and was amazed at what he saw. Both of them went inside and Daryl inspected the motorcycles in silence. He wiped some dust off of the gas tank of one of them. "Looks like they were new when everythin` went to shit."

       "I wonder if they still run."         

       Daryl got on one and turned the key. The engine roared to life. He bounced on the seat for a moment then turned off the engine. He went over and climbed on the other one. The engine on it started as well. After turning it off he unscrewed the lid of the gas tank and looked inside. He glanced around and saw some gas cans. "See if them cans are full."

       Jesus picked up one and could hear the liquid slosh around. "I think we just hit the jackpot."

      "Yeah, let`s load `em up in the van."

      After getting the motorcycles and gas cans in the back of the van, they went back into the cabin. The sun had come out and the air suddenly started to heat up.

      "I hate this time of year," Jesus said as he drank some water trying to stem off the effects of their earlier indulgences. "Cold during the day, cold at night, hot during the day." He paused and stared at Daryl. "Hoping it`ll be hot at night."

      Daryl knew what Jesus might be hinting at but showed no expression. For an instant he saw himself and Jesus--. "We can hole up durin` the winter and--." He felt himself blush slightly and turned his face away. Daryl knew in that instant he had a clear picture of his true feelings towards Jesus.

      "We still have some time before the snow flies." Jesus yawned feeling too sleepy to do anything more, including scavenging. "I think I need to sleep things off."

      "I think we both do." Daryl pointed to one of the easy chairs. "I`ll take that." He sat down in the recliner and put the footrest up.

      Jesus plopped down on the sofa and laid down. As he fell asleep he couldn`t take his eyes off of Daryl. "I want you so much," he whispered so softly not even the moth that fluttered out from beneath the cushion could hear him.

      Both had slept for almost two hours and Jesus awoke with the sound of Daryl stacking some wood by the fireplace. There was a clap of thunder outside. Jesus got up stretching and yawning, feeling a slight headache, but at least his head was clear. "Is it getting cold again?"

      "A little," Daryl said. "We don`t need the fire yet." He sat down and stared at the cigar box and sighed. "Shit."

      "Something wrong?" Jesus asked.

      "I don`t know." Daryl picked up the box, opened it and took out another joint. "I thought I was beyond this kind of shit."

      "It really didn`t hurt either of us." Jesus rubbed his head. "Well, except for a slight hangover. I think we both needed to escape for a bit."

      "Yeah." Daryl put the joint back in and closed the box, tossing it aside. "I got somethin` goin` on inside of me. I can`t put my finger on it exactly." He glanced at Jesus as he took out his pack of Morley`s and lit up.

      Jesus closed his eyes and ran his hands through his hair. "Daryl, there`s something I need to tell you. I`m afraid if I do you`ll hate me or never have anything more to do with me."

      Daryl couldn`t even begin to imagine what Jesus had to say that made it so difficult. "What?"

      "I`ve been running away because I don`t want to be completely honest with myself." He paused trying to find the courage, looking away from Daryl then met him eye to eye. "I`m in love with you."

      Daryl only sat there in silence for a long time. Jesus wasn`t sure if he had offended Daryl or not. 

      "You`re gay?" Jesus nodded. Daryl took a couple more puffs of his cigarette. He looked away from Jesus and stared into the cold fireplace then got up and paced for a few minutes, only to stop and look out the window to see that below the clouds the sun was getting low in the sky. After finishing the cigarette Daryl knelt down and rummaged through his backpack. He stopped and looked up at Jesus. "So am I," he said in a barely audible whisper.

      "Nobody knows?"

      "You`re the only one." Daryl took out a couple cans of soup and tossed one to Jesus.

      "I take it you`ve had to keep it secret all of your life."

      "Yeah. Where I come from they love to beat queers to death. My brother did too." 

      "Did he know?"

      "Yeah. He wanted to beat me but never did. Anyone else know about ya?"

      Jesus nodded. "Maggie. Couple of others. Maybe some have guessed, but they don`t say anything. It`s something I prefer to keep to myself, more or less. I was really afraid to come out to you, especially when I realized my feelings were getting deeper."

      Daryl emitted a short laugh. "I remember how ya flirted with me after our first meetin`. Then at Alexandria and later again at Hilltop."

      Jesus laughed. "I remember the chase through the field best."

      "Ya drivin` that truck all crazy."

      "I was an ambulance driver at one time."

      "So that`s why." Daryl grinned. "Is that why it went into the lake? That was your fault."

      "Oh no, that`s on you. You`re the one who wanted your gun back."

      "That`s cuz it was my gun and ya stole it."

      "I saved you from that walker."

      "I thanked ya for it afterwards."

      Their rapid-fire talking stopped for a moment and they merely stared at each other before both burst into laughter.

      "I guess I`m attracted to ya, too, Paul," Daryl said after a pause.

      "You`re frightened of those feelings aren`t you."

      Daryl nodded. "I shouldn`t be, but I am." He took out two bottles of water and tossed one to Jesus. "Merle used to call me Darylina." Jesus could see Daryl become somewhat misty eyed. He knew how much it hurt Daryl to talk about such things. "Called me a pervert."

      "He was wrong," Jesus said. "This is how we were both born. This is our nature."

      Daryl came over and sat down beside him. "Ya don`t feel dirty? Or sick?"

      "No. It`s a part of me that`s just natural. It took me a long time to believe that." Jesus reached over and gently stroked Daryl`s cheek. "Why do those who are supposed to love you hurt you so much? I saw the scars on your back the day I brought you back from the Sanctuary and helped you clean up."

      "Don`t know the answer myself," Daryl said quietly. "I was readin` a book about survivin` child abuse. It said none of it was my fault. I didn`t do nothin` wrong."

      "Don`t ever blame yourself," Jesus said. "Your father had a lot of insecurity probably from his father, who got it from his father. Who knows how far back it`s gone. He had no right to dump it on you or your brother, but he did." Jesus grasped Daryl by the shoulders. "But you stopped it from going any further. You read that book wanting to find some answers. Look at where you are now. A survivor of your past as well as the apocalypse."

       Daryl smiled slightly. "I ain`t never thought about it like that."

       "Now it`s time for both of us to turn another corner. I have to learn to stop running away." Jesus let Daryl go and turned away from him. "I have to learn to finally let someone in."

       "Yeah." Daryl paused. "Damn, you`re so easy to talk to, Paul. We done more of that than scavengin`."

       Jesus laughed. "I know. Horrible people aren`t we, not thinking of others."

      Daryl looked out the window. "Guess we stay here for the night."

      "A couple of drunk tokers."   

      "I`m a real asshole when I`m drunk, more than my usual asshole."

      "Oh, I`m not worried. I know karate." Jesus flashed a smirk at him.

      "Shit. Let`s get somethin` to eat." Daryl got up and returned to preparing the fire so they could at least heat their cans of soup.

      As he did so Jesus picked up Daryl`s crossbow and inspected it. "I know how to use a lot of weapons, but I`ve never shot a crossbow."

      "It ain`t hard to learn," Daryl said.

      Jesus held up the weapon in a shooting position. "It has great balance." He watched as Daryl tried to light the fire and noticed his hands were shaking. "Need some help?"

      "Nah, I can get it."

      "Why are your hands shaking? Are you cold?"

      "Nah." Daryl didn`t want to admit to himself or to Jesus that his attraction to the other man was stronger than either of them wanted to believe. Now that he had a moment to think about what they had just admitted to each other, he felt himself growing nervous. "Ya know, I think I left some of them tools we found outside the van. I`m gonna put `em in before they rust." Daryl suddenly left the cabin right in the middle of building the fire.

      Jesus looked after him with a somewhat baffled look on his face. He got up and went over to the window. The rain was pouring down steadily and he knew that Daryl would be drenched when he returned to the cabin. Jesus stopped at the door. "Leave them," he yelled. "We`ve got plenty of tools already."

      Daryl glanced at him and opened up the back of the van. "These are for the bikes." Daryl`s tone had a sharpness to it.

      "Oh come on. An engine is an engine. The same tools are used for all engines and we have them at Hilltop for the cars." Jesus knew that Daryl already knew that particular fact. He seemed to be ignoring him. "You`re already soaked."

     "Been soaked before."

     "Damn, stubborn--," Jesus muttered under his breath. "Goddammit, Daryl, this rain is a cold rain, not a warm summer rain."

     "Been cold before, too." Daryl slipped the tools into the back of the van. "Gonna go check the barn."

      Jesus stepped outside and came over to him. "What the hell is the matter with you?"

      Daryl didn`t answer him but only continued on his way. Now also soak and wet, Jesus followed him into the barn.

      "I can do this by myself," Daryl said now getting angry.

      "And here I thought I was the one running away."

      "What`s that supposed to mean?" Daryl glared at him and put his face directly into Jesus`s.

      Jesus glared right back at him refusing to back down. "I thought we were having a moment, you know? I thought we were finally breaking through to each other. You run out the fucking door in the middle of fixing dinner." Jesus could feel his ire rising as well.

      "If you`re hungry, you know how to cook." Daryl moved away from him and grabbed some fishing gear he found stacked in a corner.

      "Fuck you, Daryl Dixon. Just fuck you." Jesus turned around and left the barn, heading back to the cabin, slamming the door behind him then sat down hard on the sofa and buried his head in his hands. Had he gone too far by admitting his feelings to Daryl? He obviously had frightened the man away, confused as to why Daryl had opened up to him so much then suddenly turn away. He took his can of soup and almost threw it into the fireplace, but it ended up in the recliner instead since food wasn`t something to be wasted. Jesus merely curled up on the sofa no longer feeling hungry.

      Outside Daryl had thrown the fishing gear into the back of the van and closed the doors. He started to go in the direction of the cabin, but instead went back into the barn. Dripping from head to toe he sat down in some hay and rested his head on his knees, noticing his hands were still shaking. In the last several days he had spent most of his time in the company of a man he had never felt more comfortable with in all of his life. With most people he was quiet, shy, not caring to really talk to anyone except Rick or Carol, maybe even Michonne. But with Paul 'Jesus' Rovia, words just flowed from him that by his own definition was nonstop. It was a concept that was completely alien to him since he wasn`t much of a talker. He rocked back and forth the uncertainty, doubt, and low self-confidence flowing through him like a raging torrent, realizing his feelings for Paul were so strong that it somewhat frightened him. Throw a thousand walkers at him and he would fight them all with every mighty fiber of his being. Throw in someone who said he was in love with him? He wanted to run, deny, as he had always denied the fact that he liked men. The secret was out. But it was only out to one person. Daryl stopped rocking back and forth and looked up at the thick beams of the barn`s rafters. The barn was a cold and empty place--an almost impenetrable dark as twilight drew nearer and another restless night would take over.

       _"Don`t be afraid. You know what your heart is telling you."_

He looked around trying to find the source of the voice. It was a female voice. Shivering he got up to see if he could find the source. "Hello?"

       There was no answer. He shivered some more and realized how stupid he had been to go out in the cold rain that was now a perpetual downpour. Gathering some courage he headed back to the cabin. Jesus was over at the fireplace trying to start a fire. He had stripped out of his wet clothes, which were draped over one of the dining chairs, and put on the extra set of clothes he always packed. Each time he struck a match it would go out. Daryl reached over to try and help him, but Jesus shoved him aside and gave him a stern almost hateful look.

       "Fine." Daryl went over to his backpack to take out his dry clothing. He quickly stripped out of his wet clothing, draping them over a chair set by the door. He put on a dry pair of pants and was doing his shoes when he suddenly stopped. "Beth."

       Jesus looked up at him. "Pardon?"

      "It was Beth."

      "Beth who?" The bitterness was still in Jesus`s voice.

      "Maggie`s sister. It was her voice I heard."

      Jesus stood up and stared at him. "Where?"

      "In the barn. Just now."

      "Maggie doesn`t have a sister."

      "She did. Beth is dead now." Daryl didn`t look at him as he bent down to finish putting on his shoes. He then grabbed a long-sleeved shirt and put it on. His vest was also wet so he carefully shook it out to dry it as much as he could since it was made of leather. It had been wet before so any shrinkage that was to occur had already happened and it still fit him perfectly since it was adjustable.

      "You smoke a joint while you were out there?"

      "No. I heard the voice clear as day." Daryl stood up and put his hands on his hips. "Ya gonna start that fire or not?"

      "I don`t have a long match," Jesus said with irritation, both at the fact that he couldn`t get the fire started and that Daryl was now talking about disembodied voices from the dead.

      "If ya don`t shove me, I`ll get it started."

      "Be my guest. I`ve lost my appetite anyway." Jesus headed over to one of the dining chairs and sat down, his back towards Daryl.

      Daryl slowly went over to the fireplace and picked up a pinecone. He carefully lit it with a short match and set it in the fireplace. The flames caught on to the other logs and soon there was a roaring fire. He didn`t care if Jesus ate anything or not. He opened one of the cans of soup and set it on the makeshift grill that had been set up over the flames. After a few minutes it was warm enough and Daryl picked up the can with a set of tongs. He decided not to go over to the table but sat down on the floor. Grabbing the can with a thick rag he ate in silence wiping away tears from his eyes.

      Night came quickly and neither had said a word to each other as they prepared for bed, Daryl in the recliner, Jesus on the sofa. The rain had stopped sometime during the night and the morning shown bright and sunny with the last of the summer flowers dripping with water. As Daryl packed their things into the van Jesus had gone over to the chicken house to gather the eggs he had found and soon returned with a five-gallon bucket that was half full. Both he and Daryl were alerted by the sounds of something moving through the fallen leaves. Daryl had his crossbow in hand and quickly raised it expecting a walker. However, a buck emerged from the trees completely unaware that people were in the vicinity.

      Jesus watched in awe as Daryl slowly moved his crossbow into position and took careful aim. He could tell that the man from Georgia was an expert and skilled hunter. Daryl moved away from the van in silent stealth to get a better angle on the deer. As soon as he had a clear shot he let the bolt fly and it struck the buck directly in the heart. The buck staggered for a moment before falling down to the ground dead. Daryl took a deep breath and lowered the crossbow. Jesus came around from the other side of the van and stood beside Daryl.

      "That will feed the people of Hilltop for a while," he simply said.

      "Help me load it up?"

      Jesus nodded. Together they walked over to the deer each picking up an end. There was just enough room in the van to put it inside, the blood being soaked into an old blanket.

      "You did that so well," Jesus said. "I`m impressed."

      "Been doin` it most of my life."

      "Please show me." Jesus reached towards him. Daryl handed him the crossbow.

      "First thing ya do is pull the string back." Daryl now stood behind him. "Hold it steady against your chest, grab the string and pull it back until it locks." Putting his arms around Jesus he reached over and demonstrated. "Then ya load the bolt."

      Jesus took a bolt and slid it down the flight groove. "Now what?" He couldn`t hide the thrill he felt with Daryl`s arms around him. He could feel Daryl`s warm breath against the side of his neck.

      "Lift and take aim at your target."

      "What can I use as a target?"

      "Let`s see if ya can hit the broad side of a barn."

      Jesus glared at him, then flashed him a little smile. He aimed the crossbow towards the barn and let the bolt fly. It struck the side of the barn, but not where he expected. "I guess that`s a yes."

      "Shit," Daryl muttered. "Ya need to get the feel of the thing."

      Jesus lowered the crossbow. "I will. Eventually."

      Daryl placed his hands on Jesus`s shoulders, then without any conscious thought he rested his head on Jesus`s back. "I need time, Paul."

      "I know." Jesus reached up and grasped one of his hands. "There are times I don`t think we have a lot of that anymore."

      "I know." They could hear the sounds of approaching walkers in the distance. "They must sense the dead deer." Daryl ran over and retrieved his bolt. They both quickly got into the van and shut the doors. Daryl started the engine. He looked over at Jesus and glanced at the motorcycles loaded in back.

      "We need to try those out," Jesus said.

      "Maggie mentioned somethin` about doin` some scoutin` for a long range scavengin` party. Ya up for it?"

      "Why not?" Jesus flashed him a broad smile. Daryl returned it, his heart not feeling so heavy anymore. He shifted the gear and pressed down on the accelerator, leaving the cabin and compound of buildings behind.

 

**#3----EASY RIDERS & A HERD OF WALKERS**

 

       Jesus yawned for what he felt like was the thousandth time as he sat beside the campfire waiting for Daryl to finish preparing their breakfast grub. The small tent had been pitched between the two motorcycles, the sleeping bags still inside. Jesus then closed his eyes and started to doze off. Getting up before dawn was a little too early for him. Then he felt something knock him in the chest followed by the sound of swishing liquid. He opened his eyes to notice a bottle of water had been tossed to him.

      "Breakfast is ready," Daryl said as he scraped out the grub from the cast iron skillet.

      Jesus blinked his eyes several times before he reached behind him and rubbed the sore spot on his back. More sleeping on the ground. He wasn`t sure just how much more he could take. More and more he appreciated the bed in his trailer. "I thought you just got started on it," he said in a voice that sounded far away to him.

      Daryl prepared a plate and handed it to him. "Ya been asleep for the last ten minutes. Didn`t ya get any last night?"

      "No. Something was poking me in the back all night."

      "This will wake ya up." Daryl poured two mugs of coffee from the pot that set on the grill above the campfire.

      Jesus gratefully took it. The coffee was strong but it was just what he needed to help wake him up for the long road trip ahead. "I wonder how far the scavenging party with the truck is behind us." He eagerly dug into the grub which was something he looked forward to eating whenever Daryl prepared it. 

      "Two or three days." Daryl leaned back against a rock to eat his breakfast. He sipped coffee and smoked a cigarette. Behind him the sun was just peeking above the trees, the air was crisp and cold.

      "We left a lot of markers yesterday. That should give them plenty to look for." The coffee was starting to work as Jesus now felt more awake.

      It was only he and Daryl who were the advanced scouting party for the small group of scavengers from Hilltop that were behind them. Since it was long-range scavenging, they had discussed with Maggie that certain places needed to be scouted out before exposing anyone to any dangerous situation. It was their job to mark those places worth looking into as well as put up warning tags in case there were marauders or another community nearby. This time back roads and long forgotten highways were the main target areas for searching. 

      "Ain`t seen nobody else except walkers." A light breeze blew through the trees above them and a few leaves fell around them, a reminder that summer had now changed into autumn. If anything, seeing the fall foliage of Virginia had been the highlight of the trip. Using the motorcycles had been the best idea. "We`ll go on that dirt road through them little hills today."

      "I noticed that people don`t think to look much off-road. You`d be surprised what can be found at farmsteads and little towns not on the map. Even the Saviors overlooked such places," Jesus said with his mouth full.

      Daryl had finished his grub, coffee, and cigarette. He stood up and stretched then went over to a tree to relieve himself. "We`re leavin` a good trail so they`ll find things alright." Daryl finished up then went inside the tent. He grabbed the blankets first to roll up and secure on the motorcycles. Moments later Jesus was helping him.

      "You know, maybe we could stack the two sleeping bags on top of each other for better padding. We have plenty of blankets to keep us warm," Jesus said as he rolled up the sleeping bags.

      "Anythin` to avoid sleepin` on the ground," Daryl said with a slight grin.

      "Yep. I`ve only done it when I needed to."

      "At least there ain`t no snakes to fight off. Too cold for `em."

      "Snakes." Jesus made a face. "I had one crawl on me one time and I grabbed my knife and sliced it in half. It still tried to bite me. Then I sliced off its head."

      Daryl hissed a laugh. "Snakes are good eatin`." 

      Jesus made another face. "I suppose under the right circumstances they could be." He saw Daryl shake his head in disbelief. "Well, I imagine if I grew up redneck I wouldn`t much care what I ate." His tone was now somewhat teasing.

     "That`s right. A starvin` man can eat a lot of stuff."

     "And not get sick?"

     "Didn`t say that."

     "Have you ever been sick from something you ate in the woods?"

      Daryl stopped what he was doing and scratched his head. "One time I ate some crazy-ass spider I thought wasn`t venomous. Thought I was gonna die. Five minutes later I threw it up."

      Jesus laughed. "A spider. You must have been desperate."

      "Maybe I imagined it. I was tryin` out some mushrooms at the time. I remember seein` a  chupacabra."

      "Must have been some pretty potent mushrooms," Jesus said, the disbelief in his voice as he checked the tent to make sure everything had been taken out so he could roll it up and tie it to the back of his motorcycle.

      "One of Merle`s drug contacts had `em. I was pretty stupid sometimes."

      They finished breaking camp in silence as the sun rose higher breaking through some sparse clouds along the horizon. Jesus paused for a moment to admire the view. "Would you look at that? Since there aren`t many distractions anymore, beauty has returned to the world. If it weren`t for the walkers or all of this tribal warfare bullshit between communities, it could be paradise."

       Daryl came up and stood beside him. "You`re probably right." They stood together silently and watched as the rays of the sun spread out over the countryside. "Let`s finish up and hit the road." He playfully clapped Jesus`s chest with the back of his hand. Jesus smiled slightly having noticed a change in Daryl`s attitude towards him. It was not lost on him that it had become warmer and even somewhat affectionate between the two of them.

       After fifteen or so minutes of packing and tying things down it was time to go. As they turned out of their camping site the first thing to greet them was the bright sun hitting the tops of hills and hills of trees all in full colorful fall foliage spectacular. They glanced at each other, both seeming to understand the magnificence of the view. The ride down the small deserted dirt road was just beginning.

       After riding and placing markers for two hours they decided they needed to stop and stretch their legs and found themselves at a deserted farmhouse, taking care of the walker that was inside before scrounging around for any items that they could use. Not finding much they decided to rest under an old maple tree that stood close to the house and still had enough leaves on it to offer shade. Daryl had placed a small target on the tree and watched as Jesus tried to shoot at it with the crossbow.

       "You`re holdin` it wrong," Daryl said. He went behind Jesus and put his arms around him to adjust his arms and shoulders for the correct position. "Ya need to bring it up a bit." He lifted up Jesus`s arms. "Now relax your shoulders, but keep your arms a little closer to your chest. Ya ain`t shootin` a rifle." Daryl could feel the hardness of the strength of Jesus`s arms and shoulders.

       "Okay," Jesus said smiling. Daryl stepped to the side and watched as he took aim. Jesus let the bolt fly and it hit the side of the target.

       "Man, that`s gettin` the hang of it." 

       "You ever teach anyone else?"

       "Tried to with a kid once. Kept stretchin` his arms out too far. Tryin` to be a superhero, I guess."

       Jesus laughed. "I certainly don`t want to be a superhero. Well, Batman or The Flash when I was young."

      "Let`s try one more." Daryl watched as Jesus pulled the string back and loaded the bolt. He then held up the crossbow, peered through the sight and held it as Daryl had demonstrated. This time the bolt got closer to the bulls-eye. "Ya learn fast."

       "I`ve always been told that." Jesus handed the crossbow back to Daryl and went over and retrieved the bolts. As he walked back he couldn`t take his eyes off of Daryl as he fiddled with the tension on the string. Daryl gave him a sidelong glance and took a deep breath before looking down at the ground. He only looked up when Jesus was next to him handing the bolts back. Jesus reached over and gently stroked Daryl`s hair. Daryl closed his eyes and reached up and clasped Jesus`s hand. "What is it?" Jesus asked softly.

      "Growin` up I was always told I was never worthy of love. Bein` around Rick and Maggie and the others--. Hershel once told me I was worthy. Carol, too."

      "You are, Daryl. Don`t beat yourself up about it. You have a lot of good things going for you. You`re smart. You`re funny. You`re sensitive." The intensity was strong in Jesus`s voice. "I care about you a lot."

      "Why?"

      Jesus shrugged. "I just do. The moment I first laid eyes on you hit me like a lightning bolt. I knew you were someone I wanted to get to know better."

      Daryl kissed the palm of Jesus`s hand. "Is that why you`re such a flirt?"

      Jesus snickered. "You kind of flirted with me, too. I don`t think you realized that`s what you were doing at the time."

      "I think ya took me by surprise." He held Jesus`s hand next to his cheek.

      "Come here." Daryl set his crossbow aside and allowed Jesus to hold him in a tight embrace. After a moment Daryl put his arms around Jesus, who rested his head against Daryl`s strong chest. "Your strength and resolve gives me so much hope that things will turn out okay. No matter how tense it got during the war with the Saviors, I just knew you would come through and you did."

      "There was a lot of dyin`." 

      "More would have died, especially when Hilltop was attacked. You totally blew me away when you rode on your bike shooting that mounted machine gun at the Saviors. You are daring and courageous. You don`t know how much that inspired people into believing we could defeat Negan when we had lost so many. Rick, King Ezekiel, Maggie--they had good words to get people started, but talk only goes so far." He squeezed Daryl closer to him.

       "Ya really think I helped people?"

      "I don`t think it. I know it." He now looked at Daryl right in the eye. "You have no reason to believe otherwise. You are worthy. You have the potential to be a leader in your own right."

      "Paul, I sometimes get so confused. I don`t know what`s true no more." Daryl wiped away a couple tears.

      "Listen to me. What`s true is that you are here now. You survived to come to this point where you stand at the crossroads and you finally know which direction you are going to go." He placed his hand on Daryl`s heart. "The answer lies here. It always has."

       Daryl laughed slightly. "Ya know, I used to walk by myself across this big ole pasture full of flowers and cow shit thinkin` what a joke it was that shit could make such pretty things grow. Ma Nature sure knows how to give a punchline, ya know? I guess the shit in my life is startin` to grow flowers."

       Jesus`s eyes laughed. "That`s right. I never thought of it that way. I was a city boy before everything happened. When I first stepped in cow manure I though I was going to die. Now look where I live. In an agricultural community with several cows. Horses, goats, sheep, chickens--we`re up to our asses in shit."

      "And bullshit."

      "Yeah." Jesus looked up at the sky. "I feel quite rested now. Maybe we better get back on the road."

      Daryl nodded. "Can`t waste too much daylight. Sun sets real fast this time of year."

      They let go of each other and picked up their gear. As soon as it was secured to the bikes they headed down the dirt road again. The rolling hills flowed around them unfolding into something different at each turn. They rode slowly in order to conserve fuel and often stopped to place the markers. Sometimes the view was so breathtaking they rode even slower. When the sun sank lower it was time to find a place to camp for the night. They came across a stream of clear flowing water and the bridge would provide cover in case any strangers would spot them. The bank was flat enough to pitch the tent and the motorcycles were parked around it to serve as a barrier. Jesus put the fence of warning cans up and Daryl put together the tent. As soon as everything was set up they settled down to fix something to eat.

      "I think I`ll be able to sleep tonight," Jesus said. "That stream is so relaxing to listen to." He put the wood down for the fire. They would be able to build it up more since they were concealed by the bridge. He noticed Daryl studying the map. "We should be near that highway."

      "Yeah, it`s a couple miles, we ain`t far. We`ll put a marker on the bridge. There`s a little town about five miles west. We`ll check it out."

      "I keep thinking about that herd. Might be a good idea to get better shelter." Jesus set the grill in place. He could feel his stomach rumbling.

      Daryl set the map aside and helped build up some river rocks he had found along the bank. "We still need to conceal ourselves. Might be worse if people see us."

      Jesus sighed. "I`m so tired of fighting. I try to approach people peacefully only to find a gun or knife shoved in my face. I mean, yeah, I expect that, but it just gets tedious after a while."

      "I get ya. Hell, even before the walkers, Merle and me got into some tight spots. I guess it was good trainin` for the future."

      "And here I expected to use my karate as an instructor or for competition. My shooting skills, too. I had a coach once tell me I was good enough to try for the Olympics, can you believe that?"

      "Now we can have a walker Olympics. See how many we can shoot. See how fast we can run from `em. How many we can knife, kick. Even herd `em." Daryl stopped talking when he saw Jesus laughing so hard he was grasping his stomach.

      "Walkers can compete, too," Jesus said between laughs. "They never stop to rest and they get a gold medal if they still have their guts inside them at the end of the marathon."

      Daryl hissed a laugh. "Shit. Shut up and build the fire." He was unable to contain the amusement in his voice. In that moment he realized that being with Paul made him feel truly all giddy inside. He glanced at the stream. "Wish I could catch some fresh fish for supper. Got no fishin` gear."

      "We use a fishnet to catch birds, remember?"

      Daryl grinned. "It`s a screwed up world alright." He dug out two cans from his backpack. "Guess it`s beans again."

      "When we get back to Hilltop I hope I`ll never see a can of beans again."

      Daryl tossed him one. "Still better than starvin`."

      "I don`t know. We`ve eaten a lot of beans on this trip."

      After eating they prepared the sleeping bags in the tent and decided to settle down so they could get an early start in the morning. Jesus watched as Daryl smoked a cigarette before going to sleep, the glow from the tip bobbing up and down in the darkness. He realized they were growing closer each day and to his surprise he wasn`t feeling any apprehension. There were so many things he wanted to ask Daryl about himself, but he knew the closer he got the more he might chase Daryl away. It didn`t take long for Daryl to finish his cigarette. Putting the two sleeping bags on top of each other had been a good idea, the extra padding was just what was needed. Along with the sounds of the flowing water Jesus was asleep in no time.

      Dim moonlight shown through the lone window of the tent hitting Jesus`s face perfectly. Daryl stared at it as if in awe. He had been impressed with the man`s fearlessness and fighting skills from the start, especially since they matched his own. Daryl had admired him more and more after their first initial meeting, even though it had been a bit touch and go. The war had given both of them pause for developing anything more than friendship, but he knew that was changing rapidly. Merle had often pointed out that he was damaged goods so the thought of settling down had never crossed his mind. The last thing he ever figured was that someone like Paul Rovia would ever find him attractive. Maybe why didn`t matter, because love just didn`t work out that way, or so he thought. Maybe it was time to go for the next step. Or was he too shy to even take that chance?

      Morning dawned with clouds and a bit of chill in the air as a gentle mist fell from the sky above. As long as they remained under the bridge the mist barely touched them, but they knew they would have to at least ride as far as the small town on the highway. They ate a quick breakfast, dressed warmly, and got out on the road. When they were about half a mile outside of the town they shut off the engines of their bikes and walked the vehicles the rest of the way in order not to attract any unwanted attention.

      "Doesn`t look like anyone`s scavenged here," Jesus said. He pointed to a sporting goods store. "There might be some guns and ammo in there."

      Daryl nodded and they headed over to it, grateful to get out of the mist. They took their bikes inside and parked them between a couple aisles. Experience had taught them to be cautious and mindful that anything parked outside was an invitation for marauders. Jesus pulled down the shades so no one could see them moving around the store. The first thing they did was check for walkers. There were two in the rear section, quickly dispatched. Daryl was the first to find the wall filled with rifles and handguns with a display case full of ammo and knives. He noticed there were also some silencers. Suddenly their attention was drawn to the sound of walkers.

      Jesus hurried towards the front windows and peered through a hole in the shade. "Holy shit. It`s the herd. There must be hundreds of them."        

     Daryl came up by his side and peered out another hole. "Guess we stay here for a while."

     "A long while judging by the size of it. Is there a back door?"

     "Yeah, it`s a fire exit only. Won`t be able to get back in."

     "Unless we come around to the front. No thanks." Jesus looked around. "These sporting goods stores usually have some groceries, mostly for camping. The potato chips might be a bit stale though."

     Daryl looked at him and shook his head. Even though he found it annoying he did appreciate Jesus`s sense of humor. "Probably more cans of beans."

      "Wonderful." Jesus lifted up the shade slightly to observe the herd. "We could try and distract it."

      "Nah, we need `em to keep goin` in that direction. Away from the scavengin` party."

      Jesus nodded. "I hope they spot the herd in time. How are we on markers?"

      For markers they had been using the little plastic flags that were once used to mark utility lines. White marked the trail, red meant to stay away, green meant that it was okay, and yellow was to approach with caution.

      "We`re fine. This little town is a gold mine. Weapons are still here, no one`s picked it over."

      "Which is what we set out to look for. I guess we stay here until the scavenging party arrives." Jesus turned around and smiled at Daryl. "Anyway, I really don`t want to go back to Hilltop just yet."

      Daryl sorted through some items on a shelf before looking directly at Jesus. "Somethin` keepin` ya away?"

      "You could say that." They`re eyes locked for several moments.

      "I don`t think I wanna go back, either."

      Jesus took a couple steps towards him. "Something keeping you away, too?"

      Daryl turned from him for a moment then faced him again. "Yeah. I think maybe--." He paused, uncertain how to continue. "I want to get to know ya better, Paul."

      The sides of Jesus`s mouth twitched slightly. "You really mean that?"

      "I do." Daryl walked over to him and stood close to him. "If I`m wrong then there`s no sense in me thinkin` any further than what`s already happened between us."

      "You want to take it further?" Daryl nodded. Jesus reached up and placed both of his hands on Daryl`s face. Slowly he pulled Daryl towards him. For a moment they touched foreheads. Jesus closed his eyes and moved his hands around Daryl`s waist and they stood there in a tight hug, Jesus resting his head on Daryl`s chest, just holding each other, slightly rocking back and forth, not wanting to let go. They were about to lean into a kiss when the growls of the walker herd grew louder. They quickly withdrew their knives and moved over to the windows. 

       Daryl peeked through the hole. "We`re alright. Just more of `em. We keep quiet is all." He put his arm around Jesus`s shoulders. "I like this." He felt nothing but gentle warmth coming from the other man.

       "I do to." Jesus felt his stomach rumble, louder this time. They moved away from the window shoving the herd outside to the backs of their minds.

       "Your belly is growlin` so loud the walkers will be in here any second," Daryl quipped as they parted.

       "We better find those cans of beans then."

       They did find a few groceries. There were beans, cans of spaghetti, dried pasta, and an assortment of canned camping staples. There were not only a lot of guns, knives, and ammo, but plenty of tools, sporting equipment, camping gear, and lot of other odds and ends that were useful.

       "I wonder what this little town was," Jesus said. "I was able to glance at a few shops. It looked like one of those tourist trap gift shop towns one comes across every now and then. I saw a bookstore I`d love to raid."

       Daryl grinned. "A person can never have enough books."

       "I noticed you gazing at my books in my trailer. You like to read?"

       "Love to read."

       "Anything in particular?"

       Daryl shrugged. "As long as it`s a good story. Don`t matter if it`s the old stuff or something new."

       "I knew we had something special in common, other than kicking the ass out of our enemies."

       "Helped keep my mind off of things after I quit school. Everybody thought I was stupid."

       A hurt look crossed Jesus`s face at the thought of people calling Daryl stupid. "You`re not. They`re all probably dead. You`re still alive. Stupid people simply don`t stay alive anymore." He smiled. "We`ll raid the bookstore together then. The scavenging party is driving a truck, so they should be able to take a lot of things back with them."

       "They can always come back, too. Nobody knows about this place except us." Daryl spotted a tabletop propane grill. He remembered there were canisters of propane in back of the store. "Hey, we`ll have hot food."

       Jesus grabbed some of the camping cooking pans. "Clean pans, too." They high-fived each other and settled down to get something to eat. After eating and cleaning up they put the sleeping bags down on the floor. The walkers outside could still be heard but showed no signs that they detected anyone living.

      "I don`t know if I`ll get much sleep knowing they`re out there," Jesus said. "One whiff of us and they`ll break through the glass." He snuggled up next to Daryl, putting his arm around him.

      "We`ve been pretty quiet." Daryl put his arm around Jesus`s shoulders and stroked his long almost silky hair. "We both know how to sleep with one eye open."

      "Yeah, I guess you`re right. I think our main problem will be putting out the purple flag to indicate our location. I don`t know why we didn`t do it when we brought the bikes inside."

      "We`ll get it out there," Daryl assured. "The herd has to thin out sometime."

      They were silent for a long time.

      "Daryl," Jesus whispered. "Have you thought about what we`re going to do once we get back to Hilltop?"

      "We don`t have to tell nobody."

      "I agree. And I do understand why you want to keep certain things to yourself. Hell, I don`t go around advertising it much myself. There were those in the gay movement who always said we weren`t being honest with ourselves if we were in the closet."

      "I`ve always hated havin` to hide all the time."

      "Did you have other boyfriends?"

      "A couple. None really close. Blow jobs mostly, except one. My first one. We were teenagers in love." Daryl laughed slightly.

      "What was his name?"

      "Mingus." Daryl held up his arm and showed him the tattoo. "We got crazy one day. He died in a car accident."

      "So he had your name tattooed on him."

      Daryl nodded. "We were drunk at the time, but I don`t regret it. We did more than just blow jobs."

      Jesus grinned. "So you are a bit experienced."

      "Ain`t no virgin if that`s what ya mean."

      "I`m not pushing. We need to go at our own pace." He paused. "I did see a tattoo parlor next to the bookstore. Maybe we can be the tattoo artists of Hilltop."

      "Shit." Daryl playfully nudged him.

      They parted and double-checked their weapons and soon got sleepy and dozed off, knowing if any walkers broke through the window it would awaken them immediately.

      When Jesus woke up that morning he noticed that they had put their arms around each other again in their sleep. Since he was the first one up a quick peek through the blind made him notice the sun was just appearing over the horizon. Then he realized how quiet things were and that the walker herd had disappeared sometime in the night. Since it was important to get the marker flag set out, he searched though his pack until he found the purple one. It would take him only a moment to stick it in a crack in the sidewalk then come back inside. He quietly opened the door the hinges squeaking slightly and checked for any straggling walkers. Not seeing any he stepped outside into the crisp night-cooled air and looked up, still seeing some stars that were bright and clear before bending over and sticking the marker into a small patch of dead weeds growing through a crack. Just as he straightened up he felt something grab him from behind and the unmistakable growl of a walker. He whirled around on it before it had a chance to bite. The walker moved in on him again and he gave it a good kick, but it only temporarily knocked it backwards. He saw two more coming towards him and had to fight off the first one, but one of the others was coming at him too quickly. He had no time to reach for one of his knives when the third one knocked him down to the ground. Just when he thought he was going to get bit a a bolt from a crossbow went through its head. Jesus was then able to grab both of his knives and take care of the other two walkers. Daryl pulled Jesus inside before any more that might be hidden in the shadows had the chance to surprise them and quickly closed the door.

      "Are ya alright?" Daryl asked somewhat harshly.

      "I`m fine." He didn`t quite understand Daryl`s harsh attitude.

      Daryl glared at him then all of a sudden grabbed him and before Jesus knew it their lips had found each other`s and they frantically kissed for a few moments. Both parted trying to catch their breaths, astonished looks on their faces. "Didn`t see that comin`."

      "Neither did I." Jesus closed his eyes when Daryl reached up and stroked his beard. This time he slowly leaned towards Daryl and they kissed with more passion and depth. "Can`t go back now."

      "Nope."

      Jesus`s blue/green eyes could look deeply into Daryl`s almost reading his soul. He grinned. "At least I got the marker set out."

     Daryl emitted one of his hisses. "Didn`t ya check for stragglers?" He peered out through the hole in the shade and noticed a couple more walkers that soon disappeared down the street.

     "Yes. They came out of nowhere. I don`t think well on an empty stomach." Jesus looked at him with a grateful look. "I thought you were asleep."

     "With one eye open." Daryl winked and playfully pointed at Jesus.

     "My turn to fix breakfast." Jesus dug out some fresh eggs and washed them, then he mixed up some powdered milk and some of Ms. Maitlin`s homemade pancake mix. "Didn`t that propane grill have a griddle that goes on top?"

     "Yeah." Daryl eagerly handed it to him. "Ya managed not to break no eggs?"

     "I packed them pretty well. Wasn`t easy. At least the eggs are fresh. Ms. Maitlin told me not to clean them until I was ready to use them so they wouldn`t need to be refrigerated. Real milk is better, but powdered will do in a pinch. The fresh butter may be a bit soft, but it`s fine since the weather hasn`t been that hot."

      "Ya got syrup?"

      "Now why have pancakes if you don`t have syrup. There`s also some biscuits. If we were at Hilltop I could add sausage or bacon, but we`ll have to settle for jerky."

      Daryl was amazed at how easily Jesus made the mixture. "Too bad we ain`t got no orange juice."

      "We have Tang." Jesus laughed at the expression of disbelief on Daryl`s face. "Oh, it`s not that bad."

      "I ain`t complainin`. Take what we can get."

      "You`ll like it. I`m a good cook. And when the truck gets here, this little propane device goes to my trailer, along with one of the propane tanks. I`m getting tired of just my hotplate."

      "There`s an adapter for electricity," Daryl said going over to the shelf where he had found the grill. Jesus liked the fact that Daryl seemed so handy with the small things. He hoped Daryl would stick around Hilltop more often and was more than welcome to stay with him in his trailer. In fact, he felt Daryl was the most comfortable there rather than a bedroom in Barrington House. Considering all that was now going on between communities, Daryl had become somewhat of a wanderer. But he spent more and more time at Hilltop. Now he had a reason, even though it was one that was to be kept secret for the time being.

      By the time they finished breakfast the sun was up and they could get a better look at the little town. The walkers had cleared out, but they still kept alert for stragglers as they looked around at the various storefronts. There were clothing stores, an electronics store, a pharmacy, a furniture store, restaurants and coffee shops, a toy store, the tattoo parlor, antique shops, an art and photography shop, and a variety of other little specialty shops that were just ripe for the picking for a struggling community of survivors. They headed over to the bookstore since it had DVD`s, CD`s, and even vinyl records as well as books. 

      "That new group we came into contact with will like those," Jesus said pointing to the vinyl records.

      "How come they don`t like CD`s?" Daryl was eyeing one by AC/DC and tucked it into his pocket.

      "Don`t know." Jesus saw some paperbacks on poetry and stuffed them into a pocket of his cargo pants.

      For the rest of the day they explored the town and marked the stores with a pink flag that were the best for scavenging. The truck arrived a day earlier than expected and Daryl and Jesus would be able to return to Hilltop on the motorcycles and were back at the community by that evening. Both were tired so retreated to Jesus`s trailer to relax and wind down before getting some much needed sleep. They both sat on the sofa with their arms around each other. 

      "Bertie and Cal gave me an odd look when I told Maggie you would be staying with me in my trailer whenever you visited Hilltop," Jesus said.

      "Do ya think they suspect somethin`?"

      "Not that we`re involved with each other. I think they just thought you would be returning to Alexandria. For all anybody knows we`re just a couple guys living in the same place. It is the apocalypse, nobody really should care." Jesus gently brushed Daryl`s hair with his fingers. "As time goes on, whether we say anything or not, it may eventually have to come out, Daryl."

      "I understand that."

      "Maybe some day we`ll feel more comfortable not hiding our feelings for each other out in public, but I`m not ready and I know you aren`t either."

      "I`m processin' this real seriously, Paul." Daryl buried his face in Jesus`s shoulder for a moment before resting his head on it.

      "I know you are. If anything love is patient. It`s those little things that mean a lot. I`ll want to hold your hand when we walk across the yard. Or give you a kiss if one of us goes out on a short run or hunting. Or--."

      "Don`t ya ever shut up?"

      "Huh?"

      "Ya talk too much, Paul. I just wanna make out a little before we hit the sack."

      Jesus stared at him in somewhat stunned silence. "Oh." He took a moment then smiled. "Okay." They kissed and necked for a few minutes. "One of these days, I will get a bigger bed."

      "Sshh." Daryl quieted him with another kiss. "I`m sure you will. Soon." They kissed for a bit longer before Jesus started to yawn. They parted, with Daryl on the sofa and Jesus on the bed. Soon they were both asleep.

      The next morning they went over to Barrington House to have breakfast with Maggie and Enid. Daryl had finished first and now stood alone leaning against one of the pillars outside smoking a cigarette and just breathing in the fresh air. He watched as the residents went about their daily business, some unloading the truck that had just arrived with the provisions from the small town. 

      "Any plans for today?" Jesus asked coming up beside him.

      "Best time to do some huntin`," Daryl said.

      "I`ll leave the hunting to you. I know you`re not a farmer type. I think I`ll help sort through the truck." A look of mischief came across his face. "I know I put a couple knitted beanies in one of the boxes from the clothing store."

      Daryl grinned and laughed slightly, shaking his head. "Silly."

      "I told you they keep my hair out of the way." He lightly punched Daryl`s upper arm. Daryl felt the sudden urge to lean over and kiss him, but didn`t follow through. He sighed, took one more puff of his cigarette and put it out making sure to throw the butt in a small bucket of sand set up for just that purpose. "I ain`t in no hurry."

      Jesus stood there for a moment looking up into Daryl`s face. "I guess a walk will do us both good. I need to get back in shape a little, maybe do some kata later on. Walking is a good warm-up."

      After grabbing their weapons in the trailer and informing the sentries they would walk the perimeter for a while they left through one of the side gates. Once out of sight of anyone Daryl stretched his hand out towards Jesus.

      "We better not wander too far into the woods. If that walker herd is close by we may want to stay close to a gate so we can get behind the fence," Jesus said looking around. "Also, we would be able to warn those out here doing construction to get in--."

      "Are ya gonna stand there flappin` your yap or are ya gonna take my hand?"

      Jesus smiled and reached over and grasped Daryl`s hand. Together, hand in hand, they slowly strolled across a meadow as a shower of fallen leaves blew in the gentle breeze behind them.

 

**#4----THE SECRET IS....LEMON JUICE!**

 

       The graveyard had only started out with two graves that seemed lonely for the longest time; not that anyone wanted them to have any company. Jesus moved slowly from one grave to the next making sure to read each and every name of those who had been lost during the battle of Hilltop, now populated with the fallen refugees of Alexandria and The Kingdom. Every so often he would wipe away tears, remembering how he had to dig some of those graves. He didn`t hear the sound of soft footsteps as he stood in front of Abraham Ford`s and Glenn Rhee`s graves before looking up to see Daryl standing there dressed in his coat with his crossbow slung across his back.

      "Sorry," Daryl said. "Don`t mean to disturb ya."

      "You didn`t disturb me." Jesus turned away and looked down at the two graves again. "Going hunting?"

      "Saw a wild pig last night when I was on watch. Gonna see if I can find it this mornin`."

      "Maggie said it`s time to start stocking up for the winter. Pork would go a long way." Jesus sighed as he gazed across the rows of graves.

      "Ya alright, Paul?" Daryl came up and stood beside him, his concern sincere.

      "While I was lying in bed this morning I got to thinking about how many people are gone since I first came here. Most of them I didn`t even try to get to know better. Now I`ll never have the chance."

      "Ya gotta focus on the livin`. Let the dead rest. That`s how I get through it." He placed a supporting hand on Jesus`s shoulder.

      Jesus smiled. "Maybe it`s my regrets catching up to me." He wiped away the last of his tears. "Maggie asked me yesterday if I wanted a larger bed in my trailer. She also said I needed to add more amenities and stop living like a frugal rat."

      "What did ya tell her?" Daryl asked snickering.

      "I asked her why would she ask me such a question in the first place. She said my bed must be awful small for two people. I told her our arrangement was I took the bed, you on the sofa." He noticed Daryl trying to hide his face. "Are you blushing?"

      Daryl shyly looked down at the ground, a slight smile on his face. "Yeah."

      Jesus looked around to make sure no one else could see them then leaned over and gently kissed him. "I don`t think she meant anything by it. We`ve been really discreet. I`m not exactly completely out of the closet myself. Our kind knows how to keep secrets."

      Daryl`s expression was one of complete understanding. "It don`t matter to no one except us."

      "I doubt she`s figured out anything." He gave Daryl another kiss. "We were making out pretty hot last night. I`m feeling something more serious is happening between us, Daryl."

      "Yeah, I`m feelin` somethin` deeper, too, Paul."

      They embraced and kissed again, this time with more depth and tenderness. 

      "That bed is awful small if two people decide to take things further," Jesus whispered, his breath hot and soothing next to Daryl`s ear.

      Daryl became lost in thought for a moment. "Might as well tell her 'yes'. Ya got nothin` to lose."

      "You`re wrong. I could lose you." Jesus looked at him directly in the eye. "The way things are going, I don`t know if I can live with such a prospect." He glanced at the graves. "Being here has only reminded me of how short things can seem these days."

      They kissed again then held each other in a tight embrace, only parting when they heard the sound of voices nearby. 

      "I better get goin`. Don`t want that pig to wander too far into the woods." 

      "When you get back, things are going to look a bit different in the trailer." They exchanged another quick kiss then Daryl headed for the gate.

      Jesus spent the rest of the morning supervising the exchange of beds. His twin bed went into the infirmary where on his last visit Siddiq had told him it was greatly needed. The double bed that was now in his trailer had been in storage. He glanced around the room wondering how he could rearrange things to accommodate the fact that there would be two living in his room instead of one. Daryl tended to stay more often and longer at Hilltop and he had always been most comfortable staying with Jesus. Now that things had become more intimate between them, there was no question of him staying anywhere else. The trailer had been divided into two parts. His room was the original bedroom, the other half was the living room/kitchen area, converted into another living space and occupied by Ms. Maitlin. They shared the bathroom and Jesus was often the recipient of one of her latest recipes, which were always delicious. He was indulging in one of her dishes for lunch when he was distracted by the sound of applause and cheers outside. He got up and opened the door, noticing that Daryl had returned with a rather large pig draped over his strong shoulders. His rugged hunter had been successful in his quest. He knew Daryl would be in a good mood for the rest of the day. When Daryl was happy, so was Jesus and since his day had started out a bit gloomy, he needed a booster.

      After dropping off the pig to be drained and washing off outdoors, Daryl came back to the trailer just as Jesus was putting down another plate. He knew the casserole had to be one of Ms. Maitlin`s. 

      "You`re just in time for lunch. It`s a new one and boy is it good," Jesus said pouring Daryl a hot mug of coffee.

      Daryl was hungry so he eagerly dug into the food, licking his fingers when they got messy. He noticed Jesus staring at him with an uncertain expression on his face. "Hell, guess I never learned table manners. Sorry."

      Jesus now had a look of amusement on his face. "Look at it this way, it`s part of what makes you so charming."

      "Won`t make any promises I`ll stop." It was then he noticed the new bed. Jesus was looking at him with one eyebrow raised. "How`s the mattress?"

      "In good condition as far as I can tell. I`ll have to sleep on it for a night or two."

      Daryl nodded. He slathered some butter on a biscuit never taking his eyes away from Jesus. "Guess I can sleep about anywhere these days."

      "I`ve been trying to figure out a way to rearrange things. I got used to just one person living here." He met Daryl`s gaze. "I want to get used to two. Ms. Maitlin said there`s still room in my hallway closet and she won`t mind doing some of your laundry, too."

       "I like her. She ain`t afraid to tell it like it is," Daryl said.

       Jesus laughed. "Can`t get anything past that woman. She told me she noticed us holding hands when she was out in the meadow gathering some herbs."

       "She knows about ya?"

       Jesus nodded. "We`re neighbors. It`s hard to keep secrets from her."

       Daryl stopped eating for a moment. "It`ll be hard for us to hide, Paul." 

       "Don`t worry. She won`t tell a soul."

       Daryl remembered how Maggie told him that he didn`t seem so insecure about a lot of things anymore. Eventually he would have to learn how to get past his insecurity about being gay. "Just need to keep our heads is all," he finally said and resumed eating. 

       "I want both of us to feel comfortable when we do make the decision to come out."

       Daryl nodded and finished up his meal. He got up. "I`m gonna get cleaned up some more. Fell down in some mud chasin` that pig."

       "I noticed your clothes looked a little more soiled than usual."

       "Tried washin` `em off outside. It`s gettin` too damn cold this time of year."

       Jesus cleaned things up as Daryl took a shower and when Daryl emerged into the room with his shirt off he nearly caused Jesus to almost drop a plate he had just washed. He never could take his eyes off of Daryl when he was shirtless. He put the plate away and went over to him and put his arms around him, rubbing the small bit of fat over Daryl`s stomach.

       "I could eat you alive just like a walker," Jesus said as his lips quickly found Daryl`s. They open-mouthed kissed for several seconds. "I would sure like to try out that mattress right now."

       A surprised Daryl found himself gently pushed backwards in the direction of the bed. He landed on his ass when they reached the edge of the bed and Jesus immediately straddled him smothering him with hot gentle kisses, his hands all over Daryl`s bare chest and shoulders. Daryl responded in kind and he held the smaller man close to him, feeling the hardness of the muscles in his back, shoulders, and legs. There was a knock at the door and they stopped. Sighing, Jesus got up and pulled back the blind so he could see who it was.

       "Siddiq," he simply said. He glanced at Daryl then slipped outside, being certain he closed the door behind him. Moments later he returned. "He wants me to help him move some heavy equipment in the medical trailer. I`m sorry." He ran his finger up and down Daryl`s arm.

       "Need help?"

       "No, I think we can manage it." He hugged Daryl tightly. "I want you so much I`m not sure I can control myself."

       Daryl kissed around his neck and lips. "Tonight," he simply said. "They want me to help tune up some of the vehicles. I`ll keep busy and think about ya the whole time."

       "Tonight then." They kissed long and hard and deep. Jesus extracted himself, grabbed his gloves and left.

       Daryl laid back on the bed thinking about what Jesus said. "I want you so much, Paul," he whispered.

       Neither of them had returned to the trailer until the sun had already set. Jesus had picked up some food from Barrington House and brought it over for them to eat. Daryl was in one of his sleeveless flannel shirts with the slight scent of motor oil coming from him. For some reason it turned Jesus on, reminding him of what kind of man Daryl was. After they finished eating Daryl watched as Jesus poked the cushions of the sofa and sighed.

       "This thing has definitely seen better days," Jesus commented. "Do you know if they brought furniture back from that store we found?"

       "They go back tomorrow I think."

       "I`ll have them bring me a loveseat and a smaller dining set with folding leaves. Also, one of those small dorm room fridges. We need to make more space." Suddenly a spring popped out through one of cushions of the sofa.

       Daryl sniffed his shirt and noticed the few spots of motor oil, causing him to take it off. He watched as Jesus neatly hung his leather winged vest next to his own long coat on a set of hooks. "The bed it is."

       Jesus grabbed Daryl`s hands and pulled him up from the dining chair, guiding him towards the bed. Soon they were in each other`s arms kissing, necking, and petting. Jesus entwined his fingers with Daryl`s. "Fuck me."

      Daryl`s desire had built up to the point that he did so much want to make love to Jesus. He allowed Jesus to slowly unzip his fly, already feeling the stirrings of his juices as Jesus massaged the bulge beneath his boxers. Suddenly Jesus got up and stepped out of his pants, his shirt still on but unbuttoned. Then he pulled Daryl`s pants and underwear off. Jesus was on Daryl in a flash and they kissed quickly and with strong eagerness.

      "Frottage, yes, frottage," Jesus said in a quick hushed tone and enclosed both of their cocks in one hand, moving it up and down.

      Daryl moaned and emitted deep breaths of euphoria, welcoming the hotness of their lovemaking. He could feel Jesus`s hair tickle his chest. Both moved rhythmically the rubbing together of their cocks causing them both to harden. Daryl came quickly followed soon by Jesus, who collapsed on top of him. They both lay there panting and sweating, trying to absorb the intensity of the moment. Jesus sat up and laughed with pure delight.

      "You okay?" Daryl asked.

      "I`m fine. I`ve never been more fine." He climbed off of Daryl and rested by his side, letting his fingers run up and down the bigger man`s chest and shoulders.

      Daryl stroked Jesus`s hair and beard then traced his finger all the way down the front until he gently rubbed Jesus`s balls with his thumb. He emitted a shy laugh. "I`m fine, too, Paul," then gave Jesus a lustful kiss. "I got all night. You?"

      "All night," Jesus whispered back. They made love again, this time more slowly and deliberately until they fell asleep. The next morning dawned with the sound of light rain hitting the sides of the trailer. Jesus realized how cold it was and hated it because he could never get his room warm enough. But he did feel warm, especially with another warm body beside him.

      Daryl awoke with such a start Jesus instinctively reached for his knives, which weren`t on his thighs since he was naked. He laughed to himself.

      "Oh, man, that was a crazy dream," Daryl said as he propped himself up. He looked over at Jesus who still had a smile on his face. "What`s so funny?"

      "Nothing." They leaned into each other and kissed. "What was your dream?" He reached over and brushed away the stray hairs across Daryl`s face.

      "I was on my bike and I ran down all these walkers. They all were lying flat on the road like ya see in cartoons and rose up and chased me. Crazy shit." Daryl shook his head in disbelief.

      "I hate it when I dream of walkers. It used to be nuclear war, now it`s walkers. Maybe my dreams will become more pleasant after last night."

      "Ya have a lot of bad dreams?" Jesus nodded. "Me too."

      They kissed for a while, then got up. Jesus shivered slightly and wrapped the blanket around himself. He peered out the window. For the first time he noticed how bleak Hilltop looked with the onset of autumn. He could only see the tops of the trees in the woods and most of the leaves had been shed. "We`ve got to find a better way of keeping warm when winter comes."

      "Stay in bed under the covers," Daryl said, a lustful look on his face.

      Jesus returned it with one of his own. "I wish. Any plans for today?"

      "Do some more huntin`. Lots of turkeys and pheasants in the woods this time of year."

      "Is it alright if I tag along? I`d like to see if I can hit anything with your crossbow."

      Daryl swung his legs around the side of the bed. "Sure. I could use a good laugh."

      "Hey, you have to admit I`m trying. I should teach you a few karate moves. I could use a good laugh." Jesus couldn`t help but smirk when he said the last sentence.

      "Choppin` wood with my hand. Yeah, right."

      "There`s more to karate than that. I do know one thing, I could probably beat you in a fight." Jesus now had an egotistical grin on his face.

      Daryl looked like he was somewhat offended. "I know how to fight."

      "Brawling doesn`t count as real fighting. Anybody can brawl. How do you think I was able to kick yours and Rick`s asses at our first meeting. A little guy like me."

      Daryl emitted one of his dismissive hisses. "It was luck."

      "Uh huh. You know I`m right, you big lug." He playfully threw a sock at Daryl. Daryl then threw a pillow at him. Jesus caught the pillow and charged towards Daryl knocking him back down on the bed. He enclosed both of them with his blanket. Daryl removed the pillow from between them and they kissed then just laid there holding each other in a tight embrace. Jesus knew in that moment he wanted to get closer to Daryl more than he had anyone else. It frightened him, but at the same time it felt so natural.

      "Oh god, Paul, I never dreamed this would happen to me," Daryl said.

      "Neither of us has to be lonely anymore," Jesus softly said.

      After they cleaned up and got dressed they headed over to Barrington House for the weekly breakfast buffet. As Daryl finished his second mug of coffee Jesus was looking over what looked like a roster. "Damn, I completely forgot. We`re assigned to walker patrol today."

      "Who`s the other pair?" Daryl asked.

      "Bertie and Cal."

      "We`ll be alright. We can still hunt."

      "I`m going to the armory. You need anything extra?"

      "A handgun and some bullets. Some bolts if they have `em."

      "I`ll pick up a Beretta rifle and handgun for me."

      As soon as they were armed they headed out into the woods. It was always a good idea to keep on top of any walkers that wandered nearby, especially since they seemed to be more numerous than usual.

      "That herd we came across, I wonder if it changed direction," Jesus said as they carefully stepped over a series of dead trees.

      "It was headin` away from Hilltop," Daryl said. "Haven`t heard any gunfire nearby." He raised his crossbow and took care of a walker. As he retrieved his bolt a couple more showed up and Jesus took care of both of them with one of his knives.

      "Eduardo told me there were seven banging on the fence this morning. Usually we have one or two." Jesus saw another walker approach them. He had a brief fight with it when it tried to reach out and grab him, but he kicked it down and easily knifed it. He noticed Daryl had stopped and was tilting his head as if listening. "What is it?"

      "Sshh." Daryl listened some more. He raised his finger. "Hear that?"

      Jesus listened for a moment and his eyes widened. "Shit. That sounds like the herd." They moved with stealth in the direction of the growls. There were dozens of them all heading towards their left in the general direction of Hilltop. One of the walkers spotted them and came in their direction. More of the walkers followed until practically the entire herd had turned towards them. "There`s a time to fight. And a time to--."

      "Run!" Daryl yelled and he and Jesus took off, sometimes tripping over fallen trees and tangled underbrush. The herd was closing in on them, more which had been hidden by the trees now heading in their direction. Jesus desperately looked around for someplace where they could get away from them. Running was completely out of the question at that point. He spotted a tall tree.

      "There," he said and they scrambled up it just as the first of the walkers had caught up with them. The walkie-talkie that Jesus carried fell out of his pocket. They climbed as high as they could and were soon surrounded by the herd. Jesus sat on one side of the trunk, Daryl the other.

      "What now?" Daryl asked.

      Jesus smirked. "You always wanted me up a tree."

      "Call Bertie and Cal on the walkie."

      Jesus reached into his pocket and realized it was gone. He looked down on the ground and saw a walker almost step on it. "Can`t."

      "Why?"

      "It`s down there. Must have fallen out of my pocket."

      Daryl growled under his breath. "They saw us go in this direction. They gotta double back, right?"

      "Only if they saw the herd."

      The walkers clustered around the trunk and growled and clawed up at them, piling up more and more.

      Daryl took out his pack of cigarettes and lit one. "Okay, we`re fucked until someone reports us missing."

      "We`re supposed to check in every half hour. If we don`t call in, someone is bound to come looking for us. I just checked in right before we spotted the herd. So we`ll at least be here for twenty--twenty-five minutes." Jesus squirmed.

      "What`s wrong?"

      "I need to take a leak in the worst way." He grabbed at some branches until he stood up. With one hand he undid his pants while holding onto a sturdy branch with the other.

      "Hose `em down," Daryl said laughing.

      Jesus grinned and urinated on the walkers. It didn`t seem to deter them one bit. "At least we know that doesn`t work." He redid his pants and sat back down and then glanced down at the ground and saw the walkie-talkie. "Goddammit," he muttered.

      "Happens to all of us," Daryl said. "I borrowed Merle`s cell phone once and dropped it in a lake while fishin`. At least ya ain`t got a pissed off older brother tryin` to cuss the shit out of ya."

      They heard the walkie-talkie hiss. "Jesus, you there?" they heard Bertie`s voice say.

      "Oh, I`m here alright. Up a damn tree." Jesus glanced over at Daryl who was looking at him with a cool steady gaze. "Have I ever told you that you`re one cool dude?"

      Daryl chuckled. "I dig ya, too, Paul," he said quietly. 

      They suddenly turned at the sound of loud gunshots. More importantly the walkers heard the sounds and turned in the direction they came from.

      "Bertie and Cal must have spotted the herd and knew we were caught," Jesus said.

      "Don`t tell `em we were up a tree. We won`t hear the end of it from Cal." Daryl peered through the site of his crossbow to see if he could see Bertie and Cal. He had no luck.

      Jesus now had a chance to look around a bit since the herd was dispersing. He noticed that the tree was somewhat exposed due to the fact that it was on a hill. He could see for miles. "I bet they spotted us with binoculars. The herd is heading towards the clearing. That`s the direction they went."

      Daryl just sighed and finished his cigarette. As soon as the herd was completely gone they climbed down. "Let`s continue our patrol. They`ll divert the herd alright."

      "You just don`t want to face them. I don`t either, come to think of it." The only thing Jesus wanted to do was hide for the rest of his life and never return to Hilltop if he could avoid Cal`s teasing.

      "Come on." Daryl grabbed Jesus`s coat and tugged on it indicating they needed to leave the incident with the herd and the tree behind and continue their patrol.

      For about six hours they scoured the woods for walkers always alert concerning the herd. Daryl was able to do some hunting, shooting a couple pheasants and a turkey. When they returned to Hilltop, Jesus went directly to his trailer while Daryl took care of the birds and checked on the pig. He helped to skin it and cut it up so all the meat could be put in the two freezers inside Barrington House. When Daryl returned to the trailer he noticed that the sofa was gone and a loveseat in its place. A small folding table and two chairs were in place of the dining table. There were also pictures on the walls and Jesus had found a special place for him to hang his crossbow next to his knife belts. The rest of the furniture had been rearranged to accommodate the small fridge that Jesus wanted. He was now lounging on the bed reading a book.

     "Hello, stranger," Jesus said smiling.

     "That pig took forever to skin and cut up. Nobody knows nothin` around here," Daryl said as he sat down and removed his shoes. "Looks nice in here."

      "Now they have Daryl Dixon here to show them right. Glad you like it. Come snuggle with me." Jesus patted the space on the bed beside him.

      They kissed then Daryl lounged on the bed placing his head in Jesus`s lap. He could tell that Daryl was tired so he tucked a pillow underneath his head and was content to just stroke Daryl`s hair, which was soft whenever it had been freshly washed. As Jesus continued to read he heard soft snoring coming from his new boyfriend.

      "Oh, babe," Jesus said as he leaned down to kiss Daryl`s forehead. It had been a long day so he set the book aside and put out the light. After covering them both up with a couple blankets and putting his arms around Daryl, Jesus was soon asleep as well.

       They had early sentry duty at the front gate the next day so both had to be on alert. Ever since the defeat of the Saviors, other communities were getting bolder, some contacting Hilltop, while others tended to ignore the more established ones. There was also still some mystery concerning the group led by the woman named Georgie. After breakfast that next morning they headed for the front gate which was probably the most boring sentry post in all of Hilltop. Jesus leaned against the railing and munched on an apple while Daryl coolly smoked a cigarette.

      "I know it`s important," Jesus said with his mouth full, "but I hate the monotony of sentry duty."

      "I don`t mind. Don`t want no one shootin` at us."

      "True. Still has to be the most boring thing to do when nothing is going on." Jesus spat out a couple seeds.

      "That`s why Maggie says we all have to do it." Daryl held up his rifle and peered through the scope hoping to see a deer or wild pig. He narrowed his eyes unsure if he was seeing movement or a mirage. "Ya gotta be shittin` me."

      "What is it?"

      Daryl pointed to where he was looking. Jesus held up his rifle and peered through the scope. "I don`t see any--son-of-a-bitch." In the scope he could clearly see a herd of walkers heading towards Hilltop. He turned around and cupped his hands. "Get everyone inside! Close the gates! Walkers! Dozens of them!" The other sentries shouted the alarm and the residents prepared to take action. Jesus looked at Daryl, an annoyed look on his face.

      "Cal said he was leadin` `em away when he shot his gun yesterday," Daryl said.

      "Has to be the same herd. They`re like a bad penny." The irritation in Jesus`s voice could not be ignored.

      "Ain`t no tree this time." Daryl checked to make sure the extra ammo magazines were full.

      "Cal and his big mouth. He had to tell everyone here about seeing us up a tree didn`t he."

      Daryl hissed a laugh. "Maybe we`ll  get the last laugh someday." He double-checked his crossbow and extra bolts. "How are ya for ammo?"

      "I could use a couple more magazines." Daryl tossed two over to him. Jesus easily caught them. "Okay, I won`t complain anymore about being bored on sentry duty." He peered through the scope. "We got a good fifteen-twenty minutes on them."

      "Time enough for ya to take a piss."

      "I thought I`d just save it up." Jesus winked.

      They both snickered then stood there staring at each other and smiling. Jesus blew a kiss at Daryl who salaciously licked his lips. Jesus then rubbed his hand across the front of his pants. Daryl stuck a finger in his mouth and licked it up and down before sucking on it. He suddenly cleared his throat when he noticed Maggie approaching them. Jesus suddenly stood at attention and kept a lookout on the progression of the walker herd.

      Maggie stopped when she got close to them and looked from one to the other. "Uh huh. Alright," she said and left heading back towards Barrington House.

      "What do you suppose she meant by that?" Jesus asked.

      "Just makin` sure we were ready," Daryl said. 

      "We need to stop flirting and fight these walkers."

      "Maybe we can do both."

      "They won`t be here for some time yet." Jesus checked his watch. 

      "Dammit." Daryl glanced at her retreating form. "Do ya think she knows?"

      "Maybe."

      "If she does, do ya think she`ll talk?"

      "Nope. Not the type."

      Now there was nothing left to do but wait.

      With everyone on Hilltop engaged in fighting the walker herd it was soon taken care of and Daryl and Jesus could return to their watch in peace. Jesus sniffed his coat which was now covered in the blood and goo of walkers and wrinkled his nose. "This is going to take forever to clean. Seems like I can never get the smell out of my clothes no matter how hard I scrub."

      "Ms. Maitlin said the secret is lemon juice," Daryl said lighting up.

      "Lemon juice. I never would have thought of that. Too bad we don`t live in the tropics so we can have more lemons. Of course, if that was the case the dead would smell worse than they do now."

      "Ain`t there a lemon tree in the greenhouse?"

      "Yeah, but it`s still a sapling. Just like the orange tree and the blueberry tree. Though Maggie is getting them to grow faster."

      The rest of the session was uneventful and both were ready to go when their reliefs showed up. The first thing Jesus did was try to get the walker smell out of his coat. Finding some lemon juice he was able to get it clean and hung it on a hanger over the door frame separating his section from Ms. Maitlin`s.

      "Now I smell like a fruit," Jesus joked.

      Daryl had already cleaned up and was lounging on the bed reading a book. "We are a couple of fruits."

      Both snickered at the inside joke. Jesus removed his shirt and stretched feeling Daryl`s eyes on him. He massaged his muscular arms. "Tomorrow should be set aside for some workout time. More training with the knives."

      Daryl set his book aside. "We can ogle each other."

      "Sounds like the best workout session we`ll ever have." He did a slight strip tease as he took off his clothes. "You`re ogling me right now."

      "Ya think?"

      Jesus grinned and grabbed his bathrobe and fresh clothes then headed for the shower. When he returned the aroma of a fresh casserole greeted him. One now set on the table and Daryl was setting a couple plates down.

      "I could smell something Ms. Maitlin was cooking. This it?"

      "Yep. Them rolls, too."

      "I think we have the best neighbor in all of Hilltop."

      Daryl was silent as he finished setting the table then sat down. "Paul, I think I wanna stay more at Hilltop than I do Alexandria. All I do is think about that cell Negan is in and get all worked up."

      Jesus nodded solemnly. "You need more time to heal, Daryl." He came around to the other side of the table and put his arms around Daryl and gently kissed the back of his neck. "We all need to heal. When I was in the graveyard I read every name on those markers. I should have at least talked with some of those people."

      "Hey, it was the heat of battle, Paul. Maybe ya didn`t have much of a choice."

      Jesus gave him one more embrace then moved to sit down across from Daryl. "I want to keep what`s left of my humanity, Daryl. I`m not sure if I can. I want to be wise in how I advise Maggie."

      "She listens to ya, Paul. We`re all on the same page concernin` Negan."

      Jesus nodded. "You`re probably right." His eyes met Daryl`s steady gaze. "Now that you`re seriously in my life I`m hoping that makes all the difference in how I see things."

      "Maybe it already has, Paul." Both of them prepared their plates and ate and talked.

      "Of course, my perception of things is probably a bit cloudy." Jesus sighed. "I have a tendency to believe that people think the worst of me. In the group home I always got the blame if something went wrong, even if I wasn`t directly involved. I lost count of now many times I sat in the corner or was confined to my room without dinner. I don`t know why those feelings carried on into adulthood, but they did."

     "Ya know what I think we should bury in that graveyard," Daryl said after a long pause.

     "What?"

     "Both of our pasts. We gotta chance to start over." Daryl looked directly at Jesus hoping he would catch his meaning.

     Jesus smiled slightly. "Yeah. You have a good point."

     "This is our story now, Paul. I believe we gotta future with each other." With fork in hand Daryl indicated the rest of the room. "Ya already redecorated."

     Jesus`s smile became even bigger. "Maggie told me this morning that arbors are going to be built between the trailers, mine included. I`ll have flowers, I hope roses." He paused to take a few bites. "The day we go public a lot of people will be surprised seeing us together as a couple."

     "They`ll have to get used to it is all."

     They ate in silence for a bit, just wanting to feel comfortable in each other`s company. It was Jesus who spoke first. "Daryl, I always thought you`d never notice how much I care for you, want you. For a long time I thought we would never get together, that you felt nothing for me. That maybe you weren`t interested in a romantic relationship. What changed?"

      Daryl stopped eating and sat there deep in thought. His words came out slowly as he spoke, making sure he wanted to articulate his thoughts as accurately as possible. His voice was quiet and even, soft and assured. "I thought romance was kind of stupid for someone like me." His eyes looked directly into Jesus`s, feeling the sense of calm he always felt when looking at him. "I liked ya from the start, Paul. Realized ya were a carin` person who gave no thought of himself. Stayin` at the Sanctuary and riskin` gettin` killed. That stuck with me, Paul. We are of one mind and I realized I had lost my heart."

      "But you didn`t approach me."

     "I was scared. That maybe I was seein` things wrong. I had to keep my feelin`s a secret. I`m sorry if I hurt ya."

     "I wasn`t hurt. A bit perplexed, but not hurt. Actually I was on the verge of giving up. I didn`t because I had to keep telling myself you were worth making one more attempt. And you are worth it. I have no regrets." Jesus stretched out his hand across the table and Daryl took it. Jesus then closed his eyes and smiled.

     They finished the rest of their meal talking mostly about the construction going on in each of the communities. After cleaning up they laid on the bed and made out, their session getting so hot and worked up they quickly stripped out of their clothing and prepared to have sex underneath the covers. They made love for an hour before falling asleep embracing in a tight hug, both with satisfied smiles on their faces.

      By finding each other they both felt they had finally come home.

 

**#5----BUSTED**

 

      The cigarette in Daryl`s hand shook as Jesus tried to calm him down.

      "Didn`t used to be this way," Daryl said softly. "I wasn`t so pissed off all the time."

      Jesus poured some of the moonshine into a mug and handed it to him. "Just calm down." He looked closely at the bloodied cut and bruise above Daryl`s left eye. "You need to have the nurse in the infirmary look at that."

      The fight with the former Savior that he had encountered who had come for the food allotment flashed through Daryl`s mind again. "It was that crack about me bein` fed dog food in that cell that did it."

      Jesus never forgot how traumatized Daryl had looked the day of his escape from the Sanctuary, especially after the way he had laid into Fat Joey. He hugged Daryl close to his chest. "Some types of healing take time."

      "We got no time for this fightin` bullshit. Too much to do before the snow flies."

      "Don`t worry about that right now. You just sit tight here for a bit, enjoy your cigarette and finish your moonshine. I`ll go explain things to Maggie. When I get back we`ll go to the infirmary."

      Daryl nodded and they exchanged a kiss. As Jesus left the trailer he remembered the conversation he and Daryl had about two weeks earlier. Another ex-Savior who had come for the food allotment for the Sanctuary had a small CD player with him and was playing some music, a catchy tune that Jesus thought was the most annoying thing he had ever heard.  However, Daryl`s reaction had been considerably stronger. He had drawn a knife on the ex-Savior and threatened to cut his throat, screaming obscenities, and destroying the CD player. Another fight broke out and it took four Hilltoppers to pull Daryl back. This had caught everyone by surprise and Jesus had to drag Daryl back to his trailer by himself. He then learned the truth about Daryl`s actions...

       _..."What the hell was that all about? He was just playing some music," Jesus said after closing the door. Daryl sat down hard on the loveseat. "I admit that tune sucks, but--."_

_"Don`t need to hear that shit," Daryl growled. "Not ever again." He picked up a couple books from a stack and threw them across the room._

_"Knock it off," Jesus said a bit harshly but in a soft tone. Daryl seemed to back down. Jesus then went over and knelt down in front of him, placing his hands on Daryl`s shoulders. "Help me to understand, Daryl. Please."_

_Daryl took a moment to gather himself. "They played that song over and over in the cell. Kept me awake all the time." His tone was low and uneven._

_"They tortured you with that song?" Daryl nodded. Full understanding was now flooding into Jesus`s mind. "Then I`d say you`re justified." He wondered if the incident had happened on purpose..._

  Jesus left to talk to Maggie. When he had returned Daryl had calmed down enough that he seemed more relaxed. Jesus was the only one Daryl had confided in about his time as Negan`s prisoner. In that time Jesus had decided that he agreed with Maggie and that maybe Negan should die. He saw no redemptive qualities in the man and from talking to some who visited from Alexandria, Negan had showed no remorse for his past actions.

      "People here probably think I`m nuts," Daryl said stabbing out his third cigarette in a row.

      "I know one thing. I`m certainly nuts for you," Jesus said in an effort to lighten the mood.

      Daryl grinned slightly. "I`ll play with your nuts anytime."

      "Keep talking dirty to me and I`ll get a boner right here and now. Come on, let`s head on over to the infirmary." He helped Daryl to stand and they left.

      After getting the injury taken care of they went to dig some postholes around the area outside the fence that would be used for planting crops in the spring. Everyone seemed busy with something. After a long afternoon of digging they retreated to the trailer where Jesus found some leftover casserole in the small dorm fridge and warmed it up in the toaster oven. It would be some time before the dish was ready so after cleaning up they both sat on the loveseat. Jesus sleepily rested his head on Daryl`s shoulder.

      "Tired?" Daryl asked.

      "Yeah. I hate digging postholes. The ground is getting harder since it`s colder now." They heard the central heat kick on. "Ms. Maitlin, thank you."

      "Still gets cold in here."

      "Yeah." Jesus closed his eyes. "Hey, you know what I`d like to do?"

      "What?"

      "I want to go in one of he bedrooms of Barrington House and build a roaring fire in one of the fireplaces. Then have one of the greatest fucks of my life with you, especially on that bear rug that`s in the parlor. Outside it would be snowing, some candles would be lit and we would have just finished a candlelight supper." Jesus kissed Daryl`s neck then lightly nibbled on his earlobe.

      "Maybe someday. We`re busy with one thing or another all the time. We gotta find time for each other any chance we can get, Paul."

      Jesus gazed at Daryl with the deepest look of love on his face. "You don`t know how much that means to me to hear you say that." 

      "Hey, what`s wrong." Daryl reached up and wiped away the few tears.

      "You know I`ve told you how hard it is for me to get close to anyone." Daryl nodded. "Boyfriends I`ve had in the past, I was nothing more than an object to them. A pretty face for them to show off to their other gay friends. Someone to just fuck and ignore. Sometimes they needed someone to share the rent. One even got abusive if I didn`t do what he expected me to do. I could have really did a job on him with my martial arts skill, but I chose not to."

      "Ya ain`t that kind of person, Paul." Daryl paused. "You`re a good lookin` man, but to me you`re more than that."

      Jesus smiled. "I want so much to feel wanted, loved, and appreciated."

      Daryl tilted his head down and kissed Jesus on the lips. "I`ll do anythin` I can do to make ya happy." They kissed hard and passionately for about a minute

      "I want you to be happy, too, Daryl. I want that sad look in your eyes to finally disappear one day. Put all the pain and despair of your life in the past." Jesus softly brushed the bangs that always seemed to fall over Daryl`s face away. He loved to look into Daryl`s penetrating sky blue eyes. In them he saw a soul that had suffered a great deal, but also a strong soul capable of overcoming the pain. He also saw a tender soul with a heart and a deep-seated devotion to those he loved.

      They held each other close and were interrupted by the timer going off indicating the casserole was ready. Jesus felt like he was floating as he and Daryl set the table. He knew the more he was around Daryl, the more he could put his past boyfriends behind and make them disappear. Someone did care for him as a person. Daryl had never felt more secure. He knew he could now accept the fact that someone did love him for what he was, never going back to letting pain and despair define him and control his actions.

      Since digging postholes all day had made them tired they went to bed early and woke up the next morning before dawn feeling refreshed. After warming themselves with some coffee they took up their turn at sentry duty, this time on the platform that had been built over the ends of the two trailers overlooking the woods that was situated right next to the fence. This lookout was probably the most difficult to man, especially at night, since the woods could be hiding anything from nocturnal predators to walkers. The sun had not yet come up but most likely would within the hour. One of the ladders leading up to the platform was located directly at the end of the gap of their trailer and the next one, so they didn`t have far to go. The leaves of the trees had mostly fallen and the view was better, even though it still could be deceiving.

      "This sentry post is the least boring," Jesus said as he paced back and forth never taking his eyes off of the trees. "I always have to be on the alert for the tiniest movement."

      Daryl snorted a laugh as he lit a cigarette. "Someday your boredom is gonna bite ya in the ass."

      "Probably." Jesus wrinkled his nose at him. "What I don`t understand is how you can see so much in the dark, especially when there`s no moon."

      Daryl shrugged. "Used to do a lot of night huntin` growin` up in north Georgia. It`s mostly mountain country."

      They suddenly became alert at the sound of a twig snapping. Daryl raised his crossbow and Jesus unlocked the safety on his rifle. Daryl shown a light over the darkened woods and it suddenly reflected off a set of eyes. There was also the sound of a walker and the eyes ran towards the fence and started to climb it. As soon as the walker appeared it approached the small creature and grabbed its tail. Daryl instantly took the walker out with his crossbow and lowered it. The small animal got loose from the walker`s grip and finally reached the top of the fence and jumped down onto the platform.

       Jesus snapped the safety back on and grinned. "I was wondering if Patches was still around. We haven`t seen her in quite a while."

       "She must have been scavengin` all night." Daryl reached into his pocket and held out a handful of berries. The tame raccoon with a patch of white on her nose started to eat out of his hand. "She seems real hungry. Food must be gettin` scarce." The raccoon finished the berries in no time and let Daryl stroke her snout.

       Jesus dug into his pocket and took out the heel from a loaf of bread. Patches twitched her nose and went over to him as he knelt down and offered it to her. "Did you know we`re the only ones she`ll approach like this?"

       "She`s lookin` for some shelter for the day," Daryl said as he noticed the first light of dawn outlining the horizon.

       "Wish we could adopt her as a pet. We could build her a little house outside of the trailer." The raccoon stood on her hind legs and wiggled her nose. When no more food was offered she climbed down the fence and headed for Hilltop`s garbage dump.

       Jesus looked up at the sky and noticed the crescent moon above them. The stars were still clear and bright, the Milky Way a dense path of dusty light. Venus could be seen just above the soon to be rising sun.

       "Pretty ain`t it," Daryl said.

       Jesus sighed. "To think this is how the ancients saw it. No wonder they thought it the creation of the gods. We need to find a telescope and some star maps."

       "Had a star map when I was a kid. Used to sit out on the porch and learn all the names of the stars. Watched the planets. See that little fuzzy patch?" He turned on his flashlight and used it as a pointer. "That`s the Andromeda Galaxy."

       "I can see it. I think over there is Orion. Then there`s Aldebaran in Taurus and the Pleiades."

       "That real bright star next to Perseus is Capella. Across the sky is Deneb."

       A look of sadness came across Jesus`s face. "We once dreamed so hard of traveling to the stars. Now? We have to start over again."

       "Maybe that ain`t so bad. Maybe it`s people that need to be better."

       "You mean this time we`ll get it right."

       "Never know. Could be our last shot at it." Daryl was distracted by the sounds of walkers in the trees.

       Jesus had become alert as well. "Dammit, can`t see a thing. The sky is still too dark." He unlocked the safety on his rifle and aimed it at the trees.

       "Maybe the other sentries can lure `em out." Daryl flashed a signal to the sentry post in the corner to their right. There was a return signal then the sound of loud noises. He could hear the walkers change direction. "They`ll take care of em."

       "It`s good to know that everyone at Hilltop can handle walkers. The biggest worry is not getting ourselves killed in the meantime. I still can`t get that giant walker herd out of my mind."

       "We`ll take care of `em somehow, like we always do." Daryl reached over and stroked Jesus`s hair. "I gotta reason to live now."

       Silhouetted against the rising sun they shared a deep kiss. "Can I blow you later?" Jesus whispered huskily into Daryl`s ear.

      "Out of the fuckin` water," Daryl replied nibbling on his lover`s earlobe.

      Jesus squeezed Daryl`s cock through his pants. "Coming attractions."

      "I hope so." They kissed once more but had to quickly part when they heard voices, however that didn`t stop the desirous glances they gave each other throughout the rest of their watch. Their relief came at noon and since they had skipped breakfast immediately got something to eat. An apple pie was waiting for them on the table in the trailer.

       "Ms Maitlin must be a mind reader," Daryl said.

      "A delectable delight for two horny pricks," Jesus said as they both eagerly dug into it, followed by the anticipated blow session on the bed. As soon as Daryl shot his jizz into Jesus`s mouth they immediately kissed getting off on the taste of the saltiness in their mouths.

      "I needed that," Daryl said. He lit up a cigarette as they lounged on the bed their clothes in disarray.

      "We should smoke another joint," Jesus said snickering.

      "Ya liked that, huh."

      "Maybe I won`t feel so dizzy."

      "Some pretty good sex can happen when you`re high."

      "Is that right." Jesus seemed intrigued by the idea. He reached up and stroked Daryl`s cheek. "We don`t mix it with moonshine."

      "I`m for that." There was a knock on the door. They both quickly redid their clothes and Jesus got up to answer it, peering out the window before opening the door. "It`s Maggie. I bet she has more stuff for us to do today."

      Which was the case. In one of the trailers the plumbing pipes needed fixing so Daryl was put to task on that while Jesus was recruited into chimney sweeping duty. The next time Daryl saw him he burst into laughter when he saw Jesus in a blackened lab coat and a turban he had made out of plastic wrap.

      "I have to keep the soot out of my hair," Jesus said leaning on the chimney sweep broom. "The most annoying thing was Maggie taking a Polaroid of me in this get-up. Oh, stop that snickering."

      "Still looks better than the beanie. I think I`ll fix Ms. Maitlin`s pipes, too," Daryl said unable to control his soft laughter.

      When Jesus had finished with the last chimney and was able to ditch the lab coat and plastic wrap turban, he swore under his breath as he made his way across the yard. There was a chill developing in the air so he wondered if it might freeze overnight. The door between the two sections was open so he knew that Daryl must still be at work on Ms. Maitlin`s plumbing. He had been able to clean up at Barrington House so the first thing he did was take off his shoes and plop down on the bed, grateful for the puffy pillow underneath his head. He must have dozed off because he didn`t hear the door quietly close and Daryl enter the room.

      Daryl set down the tool box and the remnants of an old woolen sweater he had cut up to use as insulation for the pipes when he noticed his sleeping boyfriend. Just as he pulled the blanket over him, Jesus awoke with a start.

      "Oh shit," he said propping himself up on his elbows. "Did I fall asleep?"

      "Yeah."

      "Maggie asked me to patrol the perimeter of the fence." Jesus sat up rubbing his eyes and yawning.

      "I`ll go with ya," Daryl said. "I need some fresh air."

      The wind whipped around them as they exited through the main gate, their footfalls crunching dried-up fallen leaves. The sun was only half-an-hour from setting so it lent an air of surrealism to the landscape. They heard the growl of a walker near the newly fenced-in crop garden and Jesus easily took care of it. Afterwards, they quietly made their way into the woods and were distracted by the sounds of another walker. They found it bending over apparently eating something on the ground. A bolt from Daryl`s crossbow went through its head. Their curiosity aroused they went over to see what the walker had been eating, which was obviously a small animal.

      "Goddammit!" Jesus suddenly exclaimed when he noticed that it was a raccoon. "Patches."

      "How do ya know?"

      Jesus showed Daryl the white patch on its nose. "Son-of-a-bitch!" Jesus threw his rifle down and angrily kicked at a pile of leaves before sitting down hard on a nearby log.

      Daryl could tell he was clearly upset and knelt down beside him and rubbed his shoulders. "Easy, Paul."

      Jesus looked up the tears welling up in his eyes. "It`s the little things, you know? The little things that make each day seem easier to get through. The world holds a shit-fest, takes away all the big things. It holds another shit-fest and takes away the little things as a reminder that the shit-fest never stops. I should be used to it. My life before this?" He threw his arms up in the air and shook his head. "Was nothing. Going from one shit job to another, sometimes holding two or three at once. Boyfriends treating me like I didn`t exist. The world goes to shit and I`m finally something. Then--."

      Daryl took him into his arms and held him in a deep embrace. "Sshh, Paul, it`s alright." He let Jesus sob into his chest. "I`ll take care of her."

      Jesus took a few moments to pull himself together. "What the hell is wrong with me?"

      "Nothin`. Just sit tight." Daryl stood up and gently picked up Patches`mutilated corpse, heading into the woods. He placed it next to a tree and patted on layers of loose dirt and gravel, capping the makeshift grave with some loose leaves. He then stood there for a moment before going back to where Jesus still sat on the log.

      Jesus had stopped sobbing and looked up when Daryl came up beside him. "Did you bury her?"

      "Yeah. Put her by a tree."

      "Thank you."

      Daryl extended his hand and Jesus took it, letting himself be pulled to his feet. "Come on. We still gotta lot of fence to cover."

      Jesus nodded and followed him, hoping to get the image of the dead Patches out of his mind. After they finished their patrol they went directly back to the trailer. Jesus sat down on the loveseat as Daryl poured out some moonshine in a couple mugs. He handed one to Jesus.

      Jesus took a sip. "Oh, I needed this."

      "It`s the way of the natural world now, Paul."

      "I know. I think I would have taken it better if it had been a predator. But a damn walker?"

      "I`ve had a buck or two ruined by `em. After all the work of huntin` `em only to see them fuckers feedin` on `em. Shit. All that good venison just gone, man." He paused. "I know it ain` t the same cuz she was sort of a pet."

      Jesus took a moment to finish his drink. "We never officially adopted her as one. Still--." He sighed. "Why do I have to be so strong all the time, Daryl?"

      "Ya don`t."

      "Out there I`m Jesus, the wise one, the smart one, the fast one. But Paul Rovia? Inside he is sometimes an emotional mess." He held up his mug and Daryl poured in some more moonshine.

      "What do ya think Daryl Dixon is?"

      Jesus smiled a little. "Here`s to Daryl Dixon." He held up his mug towards Daryl and took a drink, then laid back and rested his head against the back of the loveseat. "I`m not sure I want things the way they used to be. I mean, I try to see the coming of the walkers as a blessing, as a way to set the world right again. The human race was really screwed up." He started to slur his words since the moonshine was affecting him.

      Daryl poured himself some more and sat down on the footstool opposite Jesus. "We may still be screwed up."

      "What a burden for us fools."

      "Maybe it ain`t on us, Paul. Maybe we just need to leave the world alone. Let it take care of itself."

      Jesus looked at Daryl, the love for the man in his gaze unmistakable. "You`re a remarkable man, you know that? You`re so strong, Daryl. More than you give yourself credit for."

      "Paul Rovia is strong, too. He has to be to put up with the likes of me."

      Jesus chuckled. "I agree. He does."

      They spent the rest of the evening relaxing and reading, eventually falling asleep in each other`s arms, with Daryl being spooned in Jesus`s embrace. The morning came with the temperature below freezing and the heating unit for the trailer acting up. Daryl had tried to fix it, but he didn`t have the replacement part he needed.

      "I guess we take a room in Barrington House," Jesus said. "Ms. Maitlin will probably take that room next to the kitchen."

      "Good. Don`t want her gettin` sick."

      They packed up some supplies and clothing, bundling up from head to toe in full winter gear. Maggie had found them an empty bedroom on the second floor that even had a fireplace. The bed also looked comfortable and warm. Daryl immediately built up the fire and Jesus couldn`t help but warm himself in front of it.

       "This feels so good," he said.

       "Nothin` better than a fire to warm your ass," Daryl said as he lounged on the bed, seeming to disappear into the folds of the covers and feather mattress.

       "I should come over there and warm your ass." Jesus flashed him a flirty lustful look.

       "Yeah. I saw ya packin` the lube."

       Jesus quickly removed his shoes and leapt onto the bed. "Now why would I forget to pack something like that?" They kissed with fervor and enthusiasm.

       Daryl got up and put some more logs on the fire. "Too bad that bear rug in the parlor is in bad shape."

       "It was just a silly idea." Jesus quickly removed his clothing and got under the covers. When Daryl turned around he was staring provocatively at him. "Come here, big boy."

       Daryl was quickly out of his clothes and got into the bed beside him. "We gonna fuck each other all night?"

       "We`re nice and cozy and warm. In a soft bed." Jesus pulled Daryl towards him and open-mouthed kissed him. "I want to bang your prostrate until you scream, then I scream." He grabbed the lubricant and wet one of his fingers which he inserted in Daryl`s anus. He moved his finger in and out and around the rim causing Daryl to arch his back.

       "Better be quick about it," Daryl said. 

       Jesus emitted a throaty laugh and put more lubricant on his hand, slicking up his hardening cock. "I`ll come quickly enough alright. And so will you."

      Without hesitation Daryl positioned himself so Jesus could easily slide into him, going deep and working at stimulating Daryl`s prostrate. Jesus`s hand also worked Daryl`s already erect cock. Jesus came first inside Daryl then pulled out. He flipped around and they undulated in a frottage, but not for long, since Daryl was also ready to spill.

      "Damn," Daryl said panting. "It keeps gettin` better and better."

      They kissed for several moments. "Daryl, do you think maybe we should come out to those closest to us?"

      Daryl was silent as he thought about the question. "Don`t know. Ain`t nobody else`s business."

      "I honestly don`t think people would care all that much." Jesus reached over and stroked Daryl`s hair. "When you go out hunting I sometimes think I might not ever see you again if you got into trouble with too many walkers."

      "Ain`t gonna happen. I won`t let it."

      Jesus chuckled. "Right. Let`s get some sleep. Maggie wants us to do some work with the housing for the birds tomorrow."

     "Shit. Does that mean we have to deal with that damn gander?"

     "Probably. She wants us to help wire the huts so they can put in heating lamps."

      Daryl sighed. "I`d rather be chased by a herd of walkers than that gander. He`s got it in for us."

      Jesus laughed. "He probably does." He dug into the covers and huddled next to Daryl. The sex they had engaged in made them both sleepy.

      "Shit," was all Daryl said as he put his arms around Jesus and closed his eyes.

      After breakfast that next morning they made their way over to the small set of huts that now housed the fowl, each species in their own separate section. Jesus worked inside the huts as Daryl and a couple others connected the wires to the generator that was now fueled by some solar panels that had been set up outside the fence. As Daryl took a heat lamp into the first hut he got hissed at by the gander.

      "If I had my way you`d be on a plate surrounded by potatoes and stuffin`," he said a cigarette bobbing up and down in his mouth.

      Jesus had overheard the comment as he climbed up a ladder. "Now, now, why can`t we be friends." The gander hissed and flapped its wings at him. "What he said."

      "Ya gotta get `em when they`re young. Otherwise they`re a bunch of wiseass birds."

      Jesus grinned. "You have to admit all of this hard work is refreshing."

      "I prefer huntin` and fishin`." The gander hissed at Daryl again so he hissed back at it as he helped Jesus hang two heating lamps. The gander gave both of them some more hisses and rude squawks so on their way out both gave it the finger. Then it charged after them and they ran to get out of its range much to the laughter of anyone who had been watching.

      After all the heat lamps were finally hung they returned to the bedroom where Daryl immediately built up a fire and they sat on the Victorian style sofa just relaxing and talking. Daryl slowly puffed on a cigarette as Jesus stroked his hair.

      "I think I saw Rick and Michonne get out of a vehicle parked outside the fence," Jesus said.

      "We got that meetin` with `em and the people from The Kingdom this evenin` don`t we."

      Jesus nodded. "More on how to distribute the food for the winter." He took a deep breath, wishing he could take a nap instead. "Earlier Maggie asked me if we wanted to deliver some supplies to the Sanctuary tomorrow." He could feel Daryl tense up. "You okay?"

      Daryl only shrugged. "Umm mm."

      "Stop that mumbling and talk to me."

      "Ain`t goin` back there, Paul, for no reason."

      Jesus nodded in understanding. "I`ll tell her to find someone else then."

      Daryl still had nightmares from his imprisonment by Negan. Only Jesus had been witness to him waking up and screaming to turn down the music or to stop beating on him. "Maybe I`m bein` stupid about the whole thing."

      "No, you`re not. Remember, I was there." Jesus leaned over and kissed Daryl`s forehead. "I had never seen you so vulnerable, your emotions so raw. I`m the only one who`s seen that side of you."

      Daryl bit his lip, uncertain what to say to him. "Paul, I--."

      Jesus put his finger on Daryl`s lips. "You don`t have to say anything to me."

      "I don`t ever wanna feel that way again."

      "Only if you choose to, but you won`t." Jesus ran his finger up and down Daryl`s chest. He could feel the bigger man begin to relax.

      Daryl closed his eyes and sighed, enjoying the stroking and company of the man beside him. "Ya know somethin`, I thought I was gonna be alone for the rest of my life."

      "Looks like the universe had something else in mind. For both of us. We run into each other, fight, and end up joining forces instead. Now look at us."

      Daryl smiled slightly and looked into Jesus`s eyes. "Don`t want it no other way, Paul. I`d still fight with ya again."

      "Oh you would, would you?"

      "Yep."

      "Then we get to make up afterwards. Make out a little. Get naked in bed." They rubbed noses and kissed. "Throw in some kinky sex."

      "Oh yeah."

      "And let the gander watch."

      Daryl playfully and and lightly punched Jesus across the face. "Get outta here."

      Jesus only laughed and his lips found Daryl`s again. "You know what I think?"

      "What?"

      "You don`t have to prove anything to anyone, certainly not to me."

      Daryl looked directly into Jesus`s eyes. "I know one thing. I always thought I would fuck up somethin` like this."

      Jesus emitted an ironic laugh. "That definitely puts us in the same boat. We can figure this out together." He paused and laid his head on Daryl`s shoulder. "You`re certainly in my heart."

      "Shit, we`re soundin` like a damn romance novel."

      "We`ll just keep that part to ourselves." 

      Daryl reached underneath Jesus`s shirt and started to tickle him on his sides. Jesus burst into a fit of laughter and reached underneath Daryl`s pants and squeezed his ass. They both fell on the floor and rolled around trying to tickle and squeeze each other. Neither of them heard the soft knock on their door. Daryl stuck his head underneath Jesus`s shirt and kissed his chest, sucked on a nipple, and made raspberries on is stomach, causing Jesus to shriek with excitement and glee.

      "Oh god, stop that," Jesus exclaimed between spates of giggling and almost screams. Daryl didn`t stop no matter how hard Jesus tried to push him away.

      The door opened and Rick and Michonne stood there, at first with expressions of concern, then perplexity.

      "Had enough?" Daryl`s muffled voice asked.

      Jesus looked up and noticed the two new visitors. "Daryl, we have company."

      "Huh?" Daryl stopped what he was doing and came out from underneath the shirt, his hair in complete disarray, covering up most of his face. He looked up and noticed Rick and Michonne standing in the doorway with their eyes wide and mouths agape. "Hey."

      "We thought someone was in trouble. We`ll wait for you downstairs. Come on, Rick." Michonne hastily pulled Rick away and reached over and closed the door.

      "Busted," Jesus simply said.

      "Ya think?" Daryl got up off the floor and brushed himself off.

      "Maybe we should go see what--."

      "Yeah." Daryl gave Jesus a hand up. They straightened out their clothes. Jesus reached over and fixed Daryl`s hair then glanced in the mirror and combed through his long tresses. Holding hands they left the room and headed downstairs feeling ready to face whatever was to come next. As soon as they reached the second landing they let go of each other. Rick, Michonne, Tara, King Ezekiel, Carol, Jerry, and Maggie stood in the foyer talking in soft low voices. They glanced at each other.

      "Maybe we could at least come out to them," Jesus said softly. "They are our family."

      Daryl stood absolutely still as uncertainty and doubt ran rapid through his mind. "I don`t know."

      "They deserve honesty from us, Daryl. We can lie and hide to anybody else, but not those people down there."

      Daryl chewed on his finger, his habit when contemplating what to do. "Alright," he finally said.

      Jesus held out his hand for Daryl to take. Daryl reached over and clasped it. Together they continued down the stairs, with confident smiles ready to greet the assembled group. Everyone suddenly stopped talking as they noticed them coming down the stairs. Carol was the first to smile. Rick slightly nodded his head. When they reached the bottom of the steps they shared a lengthy kiss. Everyone gathered around them to acknowledge the new couple with supportive hugs and congratulations.

      For the time being, Daryl Dixon and Paul 'Jesus' Rovia were content with the hopes of what was to come for the two of them now that they were together. They knew there would be a lot of challenges due to their insecurities, but they reveled in the fact that neither of them would ever have to be alone ever again. With that thought foremost in their minds, a deeper love of one soul for another would bring them through the darkness, a beacon to guide them along a difficult path towards an uncertain future.

 

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End file.
